Saturday , September 19 2020

Beware Neighbor Girls and Nail Guns

Talk about people not in touch with themselves: this guy was unaware that he had shot a nail into his brain:

    A dentist found the source of the toothache Patrick Lawler was complaining about on the roof of his mouth: a four-inch nail the construction worker had unknowingly embedded in his skull six days earlier.

    A nail gun backfired on Lawler, 23, on Jan. 6 while working in Breckenridge, a ski resort town in the central Colorado mountains. The tool sent a nail into a piece of wood nearby, but Lawler didn’t realize a second nail had shot through his mouth, said his sister, Lisa Metcalse.

    Following the accident, Lawler had what he thought was a minor toothache and blurry vision. On Wednesday, after painkillers and ice didn’t ease the pain, he went to a dental office where his wife, Katerina, works.

    ….He was taken to a suburban Denver hospital, where he underwent a four-hour surgery. The nail had plunged 1 1/2 inches into his brain, barely missing his right eye, Metcalse said.

    “This is the second one we’ve seen in this hospital where the person was injured by the nail gun and didn’t actually realize the nail had been imbedded in their skull,” neurosurgeon Sean Markey told KUSA-TV in Denver. “But it’s a pretty rare injury.” [AP]

Rare, but not rare enough. I too had a nail stuck in my head, though a nail gun was not involved.

When I was 4 or 5 I was playing in our backyard in San Pedro with the two girls from next door. I remember very vividly the strong, almost painfully bright sun reflecting off the bits of quartz in the gravel that made up the pit for our swing set/slide apparatus. After sliding down the slide I was circling back to go again when the younger of the sisters accidentally tripped me.

Sticking pointy-end-up out of the gravel was a nail. As I vaulted forward the top of my head landed directly on the nail which became embedded in my skull. I was unaware of this as I staggered to my feet. The girls freaked, my parents freaked. I don’t really remember any particular pain — I was in shock.

I don’t remember much after that other than getting a bunch of shots that hurt like a screaming mofo. The doctor said the nail didn’t quite make it to my brain, but it was close. He said I must have looked pretty funny standing there with a nail sticking out of my head. Ha ha.

So I feel your pain Patrick, although it didn’t take me a week to figure what the hell was wrong with me. Incidentally, the dude has no health insurance (can relate to THAT part also) and at least $100K in hospital bills. You can donate to the “Patrick Lawler Fund” by calling the Colorado Business Bank of Littleton at 303-293-2265.

About Eric Olsen

Career media professional and serial entrepreneur Eric Olsen flung himself into the paranormal world in 2012, creating the America's Most Haunted brand and co-authoring the award-winning America's Most Haunted book, published by Berkley/Penguin in Sept, 2014. Olsen is co-host of the nationally syndicated broadcast and Internet radio talk show After Hours AM; his entertaining and informative America's Most Haunted website and social media outlets are must-reads: [email protected], Facebook.com/amhaunted, Pinterest America's Most Haunted. Olsen is also guitarist/singer for popular and wildly eclectic Cleveland cover band The Props.

Check Also

Comic Review: ‘Department of Mind-Blowing Theories’ by Tom Gauld from Drawn+Quarterly

'Department of Mind-Blowing Theories' by Tom Gauld published by Drawn+Quarterly is a chuckle-with-tongue-in-cheek collection of gags all on aspects of the scientific community.