So this is what Steven meant by “Brand Tyler,” then?
Look, I can forgive Aerosmith for participating in the Bee Gees’ legendarily rancid remake of Sgt. Peppers Lonely Hearts Club Band back in 1978…well okay, almost. Aerosmith’s version of “Come Together” was actually one of the few highlights of that soundtrack (along with Earth Wind & Fire doing “Got To Get You Into My Life”).
I’m also willing to give American Idol all due props for making the world a slightly better place by introducing us to the likes of Carrie Underwood and “Pants On The Ground” guy. Clay Aiken and Adam Lambert on the other hand, maybe not so much.
But one-time rock god Steven Tyler judging the world’s greatest karaoke contest each week on national TV? You’ve got to be kidding, right?
Well, let’s be honest here. Tyler’s own once mighty rock-cred has been in jeopardy for some time now. Theme parks and SuperBowl appearances alongside Justin Timberlake and Britney Spears aside, Aerosmith’s once mightily rolling train probably left the station for good back in the mid-eighties around the time they traded the cock-rock anthems like “Lord Of The Thighs” in for all of those horrid power ballads…and I’m not referring to “Dream On” either.
Speaking of “Dream On,” let’s talk about Tyler as a singer for a minute. Just how many decades has it been since he was able to hit those high-pitched screams on the aforementioned “Dream On” onstage anyway? That sarcastic giggle you hear is Simon Cowell laughing his ass off the first time Tyler has the stones to call one of his Idol hopefuls a little “pitchy.”
Speaking of Simon, whatever happened to all the talk of bringing Howard Stern on board to fill his chair? Whether you love him or hate him, there’s no doubt that Stern’s caustic personality would have made a better fit. Stern would have also added some much needed humor to the mix, at exactly the time this once unstoppable, now precariously teetering franchise could most use it.
As for American Ty-dol? Sorry Dawg, Not buying it. There, I Said It!