Thanks for joining us for tonight’s big announcement.
The Coalition of Republican Aggressive Propagandists (CRAP) is pleased to announce its winners for the 2005 award for propagandist of the year. Past winners have included Oliver North, Roger Ailes, and our founder, Richard Nixon.
This year we have, for the first time, a tie. Let’s hear it for Judith Miller of the New York Times, and I. Lewis Libby, former Dick Cheney’s chief of staff. They went above and beyond the call of duty, going way beyond their job description, not letting petty details like truth, laws, responsibilities or grand juries get in the way of what truly matters.
And what’s that? Yes, that’s right – getting the Republican spin into the news, subverting the political process and making more people vote “right”.. these are a few of our favorite things.
They were both nominated by Dick Cheney, who would be here today but he’s busy meeting with Karl Rove to plan on how they are going to try to get the indictments against Libby squashed.
On his nomination form, Cheney writes: “If they win, they should be sent – together – to live on the streets of Baghdad so they can watch, in person, the flowering of democracy in that saved nation.”
Ha! That Cheney is such a kidder.
No, as winners they both win a 25 percent share in Fox News and autographed books by Bill O’Reilly and Robert Novak.
Novak and Rove were also nominees this year but just did not go far enough. There’s always next year!
Thanks, you two, for providing the best CRAP of the year.