Saturday , October 31 2020

Battle of the Bulges

The Specious Report strikes again with a debate between California gubernatorial candidates Arnold Schwarnenegger and Sunset Strip scenester Angelyne:

    It has been theorized that someone could win this election with as little as 12% of the vote. Will your campaign avoid any serious discussion of the issues as long as possible, relying mostly on name recognition and trite slogans?

    Angelyne: [long silence] “Look at my breasts.”

    Schwarzenegger: [unintelligible] “Hasta la vista baby.” [unintelligible] “I’ll be back.”

    California, the world’s fifth-largest economy, is facing catastrophic deficits, a lingering energy crisis, water shortages, environmental concerns, unemployment, a depressed high-tech industry, and now rising interest rates threaten any foreseeable recovery. These are complex problems requiring real solutions. Should your candidacy be regarded as anything more than frivolous self-promotion?

    Angelyne: [long silence] “My doggie is pink too.”

    Schwarzenegger: [unintelligible] “Remember when I said I would kill you last? I lied.”….

I suppose having an impressive chest is as important
in a governor as most other attributes. Why didn’t Elvira run?

About Eric Olsen

Career media professional and serial entrepreneur Eric Olsen flung himself into the paranormal world in 2012, creating the America's Most Haunted brand and co-authoring the award-winning America's Most Haunted book, published by Berkley/Penguin in Sept, 2014. Olsen is co-host of the nationally syndicated broadcast and Internet radio talk show After Hours AM; his entertaining and informative America's Most Haunted website and social media outlets are must-reads: [email protected],, Pinterest America's Most Haunted. Olsen is also guitarist/singer for popular and wildly eclectic Cleveland cover band The Props.

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