Friday , April 26 2024
Turning Twitter trending topics into a musical...

A Musical Ode To Spain, The World Cup, Mel Gibson, and Lindsay Lohan

Verse Chorus Verse goes Law & Order today, ripping our songs of the day from the headlines.  Actually this is Law & Order 2.0 because I've taken these not from headlines but from Twitter trending topics (you can follow me on Twitter if you want to know what I'm tweeting about).  Here are a few musical dedications to the topics on your mind…

Spain Wins The World Cup

The Ramones – "I Don't Care" – Anthology:  It's nothing personal, Spain.  I wouldn't have cared if any of 31 countries had won the World Cup.  I'd have been modestly interested in an improbable (okay let's face it, impossible) U.S. win.  I know, I know, soccer is the beautiful game and the world's past time.  I'm not anti-soccer.  I don't hate soccer.  I just, well, as the song says don't care.  I don't mind the highlights on my TV.  I don't mind the coverage… until sports columnists and talking heads start with the angle there's something wrong with me and/or Americans in general for not sharing the world's interest.  Lady GaGa is selling millions upon millions of records.  Sometimes the world is wrong.  God bless them for it.  Congratulations, Spain.  Enjoy your hard-earned victory.  I just don't care.

Mel Gibson

Mudhoney – "You Stupid Asshole" – march to fuzz:  I was shocked and offended by Mel Gibson's tirade when he was arrested for drunk driving a couple years ago, a tirade that included some despicable anti-Semitic sentiments.  I was troubled but willing to accept that maybe, just maybe, it was the booze talking.  Some people felt the booze lowered his inhibition and revealed his true feelings.  If alcohol is really a truth elixir, I think we're all in a lot of trouble.  I wasn't of a mind to give him a pass but I was keeping an open mind.  Until… The latest snapshot into the mind of Gibson has pushed me over the edge.  We've all had bad breakups and I'm sure we'd all be embarrassed if someone had audio tape of things we said at those moments.  It's not that I feel qualified to sit in judgment of him but what he said to his estranged partner was hateful, vile, and cruel.  If all he loses is what's left of his career, he's getting off easy. 

Lindsay Lohan

Johnny Young – "Prison Bound" – The Complete Blue Horizon Sessions:  So let me get this straight: Lindsay Lohan is going to do time for being a vapid, drunken, useless whore but Roman Polanski is going to continue skating on child rape charges.  To quote Randal from Clerks II: "Oh what the fuck happened to this world?"  I know, I know.  I'm mixing my metaphors.  I'm just trying to reconcile the news from last Friday about Lohan's jail sentence scheduled to begin July 20 and the news of the morning that Switzerland's government has decided against extraditing Polanski to the U.S. to answer for his crime.  I don't understand it and I've decided I'm glad I don't.  I prefer living in a world where something like this seems outrageous and preposterous.  Oh- and Johnny Young plays some killer mandolin on this track.

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