“Tonight is ze big day”

The horrid little French-Canadian diva twig has dug in for three years in Las Vegas:

Celine Dion took the stage Tuesday night at Caesars Palace in the debut of “A New Day,” a multimillion-dollar extravaganza that will test the French-Canadian superstar’s staying power.

The diva belted out 20 tunes in 100 minutes in front of an adoring crowd at the 4,100-seat Colosseum. The audience couldn’t get enough.

“We love you Celine,” they shouted, and gave her a series of standing ovations.

….”I want to thank you for being here … with everything that is going on in the world, let’s just try tonight to focus on peace. Let’s try to enjoy ourselves tonight.” [AP]

Et tu, Celine?

Fortunately for Caesars, there is more to the show than Dion’s repugnant oversinging – this from her website:

A NEW DAY … presented by Chrysler will transport the audience to a unique theatrical world; each song will evoke a different visual experience. A NEW DAY … presented by Chrysler will feature the largest indoor LED screen in North America. Dragone will use the screen to evoke the mood within the music and create an environment that transcends the usual physical limitations of theatrical productions. With lighting, projected images, traditional props and remarkably sharp three-dimensional screen graphics, the set for A NEW DAY … presented by Chrysler will place Celine, the performers and, indeed, the audience in European town squares, great city centers, picturesque antique temples and starry sky-scapes. An extraordinary illusion of depth is created; the 4,000-seat Colosseum ends up feeling less like a traditional theatre than like an immense public space. A NEW DAY … presented by Chrysler is theatre of life.

Celine is joined by a cast of fifty-eight performers, musicians and vocalists. The artists have not only worked at perfecting stunning choreographies, but have mastered the challenges of physical and aerial training and percussion and vocal sessions through intensive workshops in Belgium and Las Vegas. The elite international cast was selected from among thousands at auditions in Montreal, London, Paris, Amsterdam, New York, Las Vegas, Los Angeles, Chicago and La Louviere, Belgium.

Back to the AP review:

Dion, who turns 35 Sunday, danced and flew from steel wires throughout the night. But the fans were there to hear her voice and got plenty of it.

She sang such classics as “Fever,” “At Last” and “I’ve Got the World on a String.” There was no encore.

….Under her contract, Dion is expected to keep up the act five nights a week, 40 weeks a year until 2006. She will receive about $100 million, plus 50 percent of the profits during the three-year contract.

Tickets, which cost $87.50 to $200, have been selling steadily. More than 250,000 were sold for the first three months of the show. Another block of tickets was to go on sale Wednesday.

To ensure that Dion can belt out tunes for 200 shows a year, a stage humidifier was installed to protect her voice, which is insured, from the desert climate.

I wonder if they have to attach weights to her ankles so the humidifier doesn’t blow her around the room.

Somehow it comforts me to know that the wretched warbler will be safely ensconsed in Vegas for three years where she can’t hurt anyone other than her misguided, Titanic-worshiping fans as she bludgeons song after song to death with her overweening egotism.

Next time I’m in Vegas, I’m going to spring for a $200 seat up nice and close so I can fart through the entire show. I am so not a fan – maybe you picked that up already.