Wednesday , April 24 2024

How Bullies Are Made

My son is being menaced by an encephalitic, dimwitted, maladjusted bully. Bear in mind, my son is only 14 months old and the bully is 19 months old. While the entire concept seems absurd, rest assured this is a real problem.

For the past couple months, it seems like every other day we pick up Alex from the nursery school, there is an incident report to sign. These are state-mandated forms that any accredited child care facility is responsible for administering when an “incident” has occurred in their care. An incident might be defined as any injury or accident where first aid steps were necessary. In Alex’s case, the incidents have been bites, bumps, scratches to the eye and the latest, a laceration of the face. Bleeding!! My baby boy came home with a scratch that was bleeding.

While I want so much to blame the child responsible for this behavior, I have to keep reminding myself that he is only 19 months old. He can’t talk, he just recently learned to walk, he shows no signs of being superior in any way other than the fact that he towers over the other children in this group. Basically he looks like a three year old and acts like a troglodyte. His outward behavior is EXTREMELY aggressive. From the moment he was mobile, he became a toy-hoarding, toy-stealing, pushing, grabbing, scratching, hitting, WWF wrestling maniac.

BUT, the real problem in this case is the parents. The Bully Dad is an arrogant man, the kind who brags about how much money he makes, how big their house is, and how his child is perfect. The Bully Mom is a bossy, snobbish, selfish person who spends more time attending to her clothes and makeup than her own child.

They drop Bully off the moment the center opens and rarely ever pick him up prior to the center closing – they essentially leave their son there for twelve hours a day. In fact, over the holidays the mom was off on vacation for two weeks and didn’t spend one of those days with her son. She was busy shopping, having manicures, working out or pursuing whatever selfish desire that struck her fancy. To make matters worse, when Frankenbully became sick and had explosive diarrhea during this vacation, she about blew a gasket that she had to come in and pick her little caveman up.

These people suck. They are the worst kind of muggles.

But what really sticks in my craw is that this is just the beginning of what we have all at some point witnessed in our lives: a blind eye turned toward bullies. The director of the center is trying her best to deal with the situation, a very delicate one no doubt, but ultimately she is trying to protect the bully AND Alex. Why? Why do we as a society feel the need to show any mercy for bullies? I ask the same question about our legal system. Why do we bother to rehabilitate when the rate of recidivism is proof positive that most violent criminals can’t be retrained to not act like murdering savages.

Everyone wants to protect the criminal at the sacrifice of the victim, when in reality, the only person who counts is the victim. My son didn’t ask to have his eyes scratched out or to be bitten. And rest assured, whenever he repeats this behavior at home — and he has from time to time — it is taken very seriously.

These parents (and there are many like them, in fact behind every bully is a parent who believes their child can do no wrong) feel that it’s the victims fault for their child acting in an aggressive way. Just today when the Bully Dad was called about his son attacking another child, his response was “Well, did such and so take a toy from Frankenstein? What did the other child do to my Perfect Monster? You know, he needs naps don’t you?”

What horseshit! Honestly, what I would really like to see is for Alex, who is also a big kid, to knock this little doofus on his ass and then I would like to see Eric pound Frankendad’s face into the dirt and kick his fatass down the street for being so unable to be a decent dad or human being..

Alas, that would be lowering ourselves to the level of the Bully Family.

Shouldn’t I at least have another seven or eight years to worry about this kind of crap? If this isn’t the sign of Armageddon then what is?

About Dawn Olsen

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