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Your Relationship is Like a Game of Sports

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Wouldn't you love it if every time you changed something about your appearance your man noticed? Or if he complimented you on the way you styled your hair? Or if he told you how much he missed you or how much he had been thinking about you all day? Of course you'd love that! Any woman would!

Believe it or not, you man would appreciate it if you did the same for him. A man needs reassurance and compliments way more than a woman. Complimenting him and reassuring his efforts will encourage him to do more of the same.

Men are very result-oriented. In other words, they need to see tangible results of their efforts. That is why they like sports – every action has a consequence. There is an obvious path to the finish or goal line and a reward for getting there. If only life was as logical as a game of sports, your man would know exactly what action to take in any given situation.

Unfortunately, there are no set rules in life or your relationship. There is no way of knowing whether you're doing the right thing until after you've done it. Your partner's reaction will help you understand the results of your actions. Therefore, you have to be creative and think of ways of letting your man know what the appropriate and the inappropriate actions are in any given situation.

Just as in sports, when a correct action is taken in a relationship, there has to be a reward. That way, you will slowly set rules that are pertinent to your relationship. These rules can be applied to anything. If your man did something that made you happy, let him know. If he dressed a certain way that you really liked, let him know. If he took initiative and surprised you in some way, let him know.

You cannot miss the opportunity to compliment and reinforce. You will make your man so happy if you keep pointing out everything that he does right. Just like in sports, there has to be a reward for every correct move, otherwise there wouldn't be a reason to keep playing.

As always, the trick is not to criticize, but to correct through positive reinforcement. If you can make your man feel good, he will make you feel ten times better!

Yes, I know the obvious question here: Am I encouraging you to "change" your man? The answer is “no.” Don't think of this as change, think of this as more of the same.

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About Ani Ram