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You Know You’re A Pothead…

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Sitting around eating snacks, listening to music, and writing this just for you.

You know you’ve been a Pot Head if…

You’ve ever said ‘pack the bowl again.’
You think “puff puff pass” or “puff puff give” has a nice ring to it.
You can smell it 100 yards away in a concert.
You have multiple bottles of Visine in various locations “just in case.”
You can’t believe someone “smoked without you.”
You know “Wake and Bake” isn’t about cooking.
You know cigars as “Philly’s” and it’s a hassle that they come with tobacco inside.
You know that if you are desperate you can always find a “nug in your rug.”
You can make a bong out of a juice bottle, a tube, and duck tape.
You have named anything you have ever smoked out of (King Bong, Chibus)
You know the difference between “Schwag, Beezers, KB, and Dank” by appearance and smell.
“Purple Haze” is much more than a Hendrix song.
You know that “Hydro” isn’t just a comic book character.
You have a “friend” that you only talk to because they always have herb.
You have a nickname for it (Herbal Excellence, Big Tom Cruise, Silly Willy Schwage a Dilly).
You fully understand why it should be legalized.
You hear things in your favorite songs that you never realized were there before.
You have “rules” (rule #3 when you say you’ve had enough, you take one more hit. And then that’s enough).
You have ever watched a movie then forgot what it was about.
You ate a whole pint of ice cream and then followed it up with pretzels, a bowl of cereal, and hot pockets.
You can easily quote lines from “Dazed and Confused” or “Half Baked.”
The inside of your car is always dirty.
You have a legitimate argument about why you’re not ‘addicted.’
You belong to the “Find a lighter, pick it up, and all day long you’ll have good luck” klepto club.
People are looking at me. They know man, they know.
You’ve ever had to abandon your shopping cart in a department store and leave because you were “getting bugged out.”
Every idea you ever have you need to write down.
You forget to write down every idea you ever have.
You lived the words to “Sweet Leaf.”
You begin to explain something to a friend and go on a tirade about something random. Then you forget what it was you were trying to explain in the first place.
You are such a vet that you can do “anything” stoned, and do it better.
You wish you lived in Canada, Amsterdam, or Nevada.
Your idea of an ideal vacation is Amsterdam (They have a lot of culture).
You can accurately portray a stoner (and do a fine impression, man).
You have a personal preference between Duchies, Spliffs, Blunt, and Joints.
You know how to roll.
You shed a tear when you see the police burning crops on the news.
You buy gum or Altoids by the case.
420 is a holiday.
2 words – Cannabis Culture.
You know 10-50 different words to describe ganjah. (Pot, Hemp, Bhang, Marijuana, Joint, Reefer, Dope, Ganja, Smoke, Weed, Herb, Marihuana, Hash, Sensemilla, Green, Greenbud, Thai-stick, Green-sticky, Dirtweed, Shake, Indian Canamo, Huang Ma, Mary Jane, grass, Ace, Aunt Mary, Bales, Boo Boo Bama, Buddha, Bush, Buzz, Cheeba Cheeba, Chronic, Dank, Doobie, homegrown, Maui-Wowie, MJ, Puff, Rasta, Reefer, Skunk, Smoke, Spliff, Trees, twigs, Whacktabacky, Whackyweed, Sweet Lucy, Stick, Stack, Shwag, Nuggets, Ragweed)

Long live the subculture.

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About ChaosBrian

  • Nash’s Girl

    That was beautiful. Truly beautiful.

  • Jay

    You know you’re a pothead when you are making instant mashed potatoes at 3 am!

  • b. herbal

    just dang awsome. ya man, freakin awsome, hold on a sec i gotta hit my bong made from a aluminum bud light bottle. definitly some kb baby.

  • Che

    To #s 2 and 3

    You know you’re a pothead when you’re a year and a half late reading this article.

  • Hash’s Girl


  • God, I love you!! Up here in Seattle a few years ago the people got an initiative on the ballot (I-75)that tells the cops that marijuana offenses are basically not to be dealt with. Official policy now is that having some bud on you is a lower priority that littering or jaywalking (true!)

    “Seattle Speedball” is another term. It goes along with ‘Wake and Bake’ Get up, light up some of your powerful herb (the world’s most powerful herb is here in Seattle. this Kush I hear about is not even close. Have not seen a seed in my stash for 25 years), take about 3 or 4 tokes then walk down to Starbucks and have a 3 shot cafe latte. It is a good high. Go out in the parking lot and light up again, get another latte and read the 2nd daily paper. Get both sets of comics in (nice being a 2 daily paper town, you get about 75 comic strips to read).

    OK, we are pretty damn proud of our old growth here. I have not smoked a spliff in years. Man, you roll a spliff of this stuff you are lucky if you can even finish 1/3rd of it. Don’t waste, just single toke out of your glass blown pipe. You’ll get a lot more distance out of your stash.

    Bud E. Green

  • Oh, as a side thought, Seattle has somehow ended up with the killer herb. And Starbucks (and many other corporate coffee chains like SBC or Tulley’s) have started and thrived here. Also many indy coffee houses.

    Get the connection? I have always thought that Northwest herb is responsible for the kickstarting of Starbucks popularity. I’ve been drinking that stuff since 1971. Go figure…


  • STM

    You know you’re a pothead when the police turn up at 10.30pm looking for a previous occupant of the house over an oustanding parking fine (he went back to England a year earlier and is now causing trouble from 13,000 miles away) and peer through the giant plate glass windows, you’ve just had five cones each, the bong’s in the middle of the floor, and someone panics and hides the big bag of super-strength Mullumbimby Madness (express posted by a mate who’s taken a new interest in horticulture after moving to a commune in the hills behind Byron Bay) in the vacuum cleaner bag – where it remains for another three months because everyone is way too stoned and too freaked out to remember where it is hidden.

    And the two police constables reel backwards in mock shock at the plume of smoke pouring out the door, laugh and ask if you are behaving yourself while you and the other four in the house are absolutely convinced that this time you’re done for and they are going to cart you off for the night – but they just giggle and disappear into the night leaving everyone saying “Fark, man, that was close”.

  • You know you’re a pothead when….

    …you have a medical marijuana card from california in your pocket and you’re not even a resident of california!

    STM…at least you found the bag…eventually!

  • STM

    There was a huge risk it would never be discovered Doug, as no one ever used the vacuum cleaner.

    One of the guys’ girlfriends got so sick of it, she decided to vacuum the house – and that’s how (and the only reason why) it was found.

    The guy who hid it could never remember where he’d put it.

    That was 27 years ago. It’d probably still be there now otherwise.

  • STM

    Andy I mean … sorry mate. See what dope does to your brain?

    There’s a reason why it’s called dope, rather than smart.

  • hhhmmm…from a physiological point, here is the deal with herb. It keeps the body in an alpha state. It creates almost like a tephlon shield against all the stresses and attacks of the world and actually lets the body rest as if in a sleep state while one goes around and does daily process.

    For example, I find that I can smoke some herb, watch the baseball game, late news, read and go to sleep. then I awake after maybe 5 or 6 hours feeling so fully rested. And I have dealt with the harsh issues of life without torquing.

    Just a nature of the stuff.


  • You know you are a pothead when….

    You notice you have eaten 12 bowls of Cocoa Puffs at midnight.

  • wtfwasinthisshit

    damn im baked. wtf.

  • wtfwasinthisshit

    hey btw… about that one about dazed n confused. i swear, ive seen that movie fuckin 4 times and i couldnt tell you a damn thing that happened. is this a good thing? hahaha i dont see a problem with it but ya never know. 🙂

  • STM – I have an old Kirby in the garage I was thinking of selling. Guess I better check it and make sure I never stashed anything in it before I do!

  • chey

    you no your a pothaed when you start every sentance with UMMM……..

  • mezface


    Too true.

  • Cheech and Chong

    That just inspired us to go and smoke another nice big fatty. Your wicked cool. peace and happy trails. happy smokin.

  • imwaytoostoned

    omfg that’s way too funny. guilty as charged. oh and doug… i know how it feels. i always put bud up in places that ill never put when im straight, and then find it weeks later just in time b/c im wantin some smoke. i love it. haha

  • wow this has just told me that i am a pothead i said yes to more that half of that god am so proud of myself

  • imapothead

    true.. but in ur names or watever u listed likeee 2 or 3 of em twice.. n i bet half the people on here arent as biga pothead as me.. fuckin liarss!
    haha idkk watttim bored..

  • hannah

    You begin to explain something to a friend and go on a tirade about something random. Then you forget what it was you were trying to explain in the first place.

    happens too often.

  • Thurogood Jenkins

    I’ve lived in Seattle AND California and California wins hands down. The high grades in Seattle are better on occasion but in California you get better quality more often.

  • SuperBluntz


  • you know your a pothead when you get so fuckin baked that you take the time to not only read the article…
    but read all the comments and post one yourself…
    and not only that!
    but its two yrs l8te!!
    i love weed…
    i live weed…
    you wouldnt understand…
    you dont know me c[=
    smoke it
    toak it
    love it
    live it
    its weed!

  • MR.Pink

    damn i just realized that i am a big pothead. long live the green!

  • growDaddy

    For really good smoke, come down to Texas. Holland imports most of their stuff from here.

  • namaste

    bitches cant compare to BC bud
    no lies

  • in denial

    It truly is beautiful.
    You know your a pot head when..

    you ALWAYS have the best meal of your life when your baked.

  • tom

    You got it with the munchies

  • HalfBakedAndAwake

    You know when your a pothead when you lost the weed you where smoking and then started to smoke the weed you lost and you dont remember where you found it.

  • pothead

    i had a whole story i was gunna say about this but i completly forgot it by the time i had scrolled to the bottom of this list, this shit is beautiful btw

  • rob

    you know you’re a pothead when…

    you’re up at 2 in the morning watching space ghost making pb&j..

  • donarn

    you know your a pothead when guys im so sry but i forgot what i was going to put somthing funny but forgot sorry again i had a good one too but i forgot sorry im not even stoned no lieanyways email me (my email is on my name)

  • bobm.

    god this was truly beautiful, as someone said couple of years ago.

    im stoned.

  • Brian

    You know your a pothead if…

    1. you are reading this online cause you were really upset about something…but you cant remember what it was now

    2. youve been reading this kind of crap for an hour and you already know the answer.

    3. You have NOTHING going on in your life, but come grocery store time, the excitement of the phone ringing or whatever, your pretty happenin man!!

    4. you absolutly HATE the way these words sound

    5. You manage to attract women everywhere despite being somewhat dirty, clearly broke, etc etc

    6. 99% of those women run before you can sleep with them

    7. Youd rather lye in bed all day, listening to music, sipping a beer, fondling yourslef, snoozing and eating munchies than go to work, social event, etc etc

    8. You cant understand why everyone thinks somethings so wrong

    9. One DAY!! you will have the last laugh!! and everybodys gonna be at your feet…you said it ten years ago, your sayin it now…IT WILL HAPPEN!

    10. your not willing to make it happen, you just want it to.

    11. your gonna go watch porn or something else completly useless and waste even more time right about…NOW!

  • Sammie-g

    wehh man!
    apparently im a huge pot head.
    and i love it. 🙂
    “You wish you lived in Canada, Amsterdam, or Nevada.”
    i live in canada. =D
    oh god i love weed.
    nothiing better than chillen with friends, listening to music, and munchin out of tonnnnns of food.

  • …you cant sleep without smoking a joint or taking a hit from the bong

    …you live off of cereal, chips, and chocolate

    …you smoke it at school between every class

    …you buy food “just in case you get the munchies”

    …you spend time looking up things to read like these

    lol.. idk.. i just thought of things me and my friends do.

  • nick c

    all da time smoke it and go puff puff pass o wait one more puff. yea den you got da idea to make a homemade bong and complete it. success hahahah all da time day and night. i got three words for all the potheads includin me

    !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!HIT DAT SHYT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


  • C00n

    heyy maannn umm… yeahh this is some funny shit I’m not really sure why i was gonna comment this and i had a good one too but i scrolled down and completely lost it well I’m goin to blaze cuz i think umm idk but …happy trails and shit mannn.

  • pink haze

    you know you’re stoned when you think of something and it makes complete sence in you’re head and by the time you’re trying to explain it to someone you forgot but you still think you’re almighty for knowing it for about 10 seconds…

    long grow marijuana.

  • gg

    THC has a chemical in it named FUCK IT. just think. when your high as hell and you say nah im good with the blunt, but when its your turn again you just say fuck it, then hit it

  • Samurai_Jonez

    you know your a pothead when something like this inspires you to purchase a sweet ass glass bong *coughs after clearing the chamber* worth every dime ;-D

  • Mary Jane

    haha you know you’re a stoner when:

    Every story you tell starts withone time when I was high”

    You understand the meaning of “hit it while it’s cherry”

    The wind is your enemy.

    You cry when your pipe or bong break.

    You sit in class trying to do the same math problem for 20 minutes

  • Kerri

    Everyone needs to rent the movie “smiley face” but i recommend being stoned the first time you watch it. its just so much funnier!

  • highnote32

    I do a lot of singing and I smoke weed. I can still hit my top register notes very clearly. One thing, you are a pothead if you smoke weed everyday… plain and simple. I smoke it everyday @ 24 years old but I go to training and work. I get my stuff done and can still smoke weed.

  • shari

    everyone around you but you knows you’re a loser & you have to find other potheads to validate your addicton to keep convincing yourself it’s not poisoning your brain

  • I like to relax and read to the music of Beethoven. Not Ludwig Von. But his brother’s works.

    Sheky Bethoven. You’ve heard of him, haven’t you?


  • hhhmmm…one thing that I find off base in this whole drug addiction arguement is, for example, it seems to be believed that marijuana and cocaine are basically the same drug.

    Get a grip. That is like saying aspirin and oxycontin are the same thing. But the general thinking is that ‘they are DRUGS!!’. Remember, alcohol is the most dangerous, physically and socially destructive drug around.

    Try this one, crack cocaine. I said to my highly regarded neurologist (tops in the UW School of Medicine faculty) this. “It seems like that crack cocaine stuff is a way more poerful psychotropic drug than LSD”. He responded “Yes, ten to the third power”. That means crack is one thousand times more of a head fuck than LSD. And all these anti-pot heads seem like they are trying to throw marijuana in that catagory…

    Anyway, these words come from the Northwest USA, home of the world’s most advanced, powerful pot. This KUSH stuff I hear about in other parts of the USA? Boring. I have not seen a seed since about 1978. The legendary BC bud? They got their seeds from us. And still have a bit of catching up to what we are used to up here. Ugh! Then, that shows features of ‘pothead’ as it is viewed in the same respects as a fine wine or whatever.

    Nor do I smoke much now. When I do, I can handle it just fine as can most of the long time culture around here. Have a drink everyday after work? Are you an alcoholic?

    Damn, I wish they would legalize our herb up here in Washington and Oregon. We could pay back that damn $700billion bailout in no time at all.


  • *is crying* im pretty sure dat you just described me from head to toe…….*sniff* dis was amazin man o and i got one for you

    you know your a stoner when you wake up and have to bowl for breakfeast and one is cerial =D

  • UHHHHH You Know Your A PotHead when your in a car,tepe, living room while smoking the cheba you then you tap the person to your right telling him pass then realizing.. wait uhhhhh what was i talkin about? o yeah you tap the person to your right and ask for you pass then realizing you had the bong, joint, blunt, etc in your hand the whole time! AND YOUR ALONE!

  • PotHead Twins

    this is so beautiful it makes me cry if ur a pot head light a blunt rite now for those who cant rite now

    light it, dont fight it

  • JJ

    you know your a pothead when you buy more than 6 grams for one day..

    you know your a pothead when you cant stop thinking about the next day and how good your weed wil be

  • Jero

    You know your a pot head when: every minute that u spend without kron, your out looking for it.

  • JJ #54, geez!!!! 6 grams for one day?? What!? Are you smokin’ it in joints or blunts or something?

    Just get a nice blown glass pipe and be more refined about it all. And get some NW Kron. The kind that 3.5 grams should last you 5 days (and getting top tier high). Unless you are into being dull for therapuedic purposes. Then a gram a day perscription is acceptable. Remember, use hi-test.

    And if you are out? Don’t think about it….Jero #55, get better things to do. I know if you could just go to a smoke shop and buy the best, sweetest, most powerful stuff in the world (and paying off that $700billion bailout by doing so) you would be doing something else. Play your guitar, man!!!

    irie mon,

  • You know you’re a pothead when….

    Is anyone keeping track of all this? A comedy routine of one liners is on it’s way.

    You know you’re a pothead when you find your slippers and a carton of milk in the freezer because you put them in there the night before. Smokin’ and watching a VH1 history of Heavy Metal episode while sitting in bed…then you go to the kitchen and get a bowl of Cocao Puffs and hurry back to the TV after a mindless kitchen clean up.

    You know that is a true story, somewhere…


  • Then you find the box of Cocoa Puffs in the refridgerator…

  • bitches avidas

    you know your a pothead when you tell your freinds you dont got any pot sometimes because you dont wana share it with them.
    you know your a pothead when you refuse to have sex sober.
    you know your a pothead when you coat has 15+pockets.
    you know your a pothead when you stop stashing your shit and just have it on you or laying on the table in your room.
    you know your a pothead when you own dark side of the moon on vinyl:D
    you know your a pothead when your best herb messes all your freinds for 3h and you for only 45 min
    you know your a pothead when your still reading this…
    you know your a pothead when you buy snacks in bulk at cosco.
    you know your a pothead when you fantasize about 300 pounds of good weed.
    you know your a pothead when you play guitar but always think your 10 times better when your high(cuz you prob are:P)
    you know your a pothead when you would rather just chill than do most things.
    you know your a pothead when your still writing this bullshit…

    lol have a good one people and keep smokin that kron.

  • K

    hahahah this is so true good job

  • lovethisshit

    im from Canada….we got some awesome shit here!
    love gettin stoned and going to stores to try on shoes…but then i get all paranoid!
    im so guilty of soo many of these….KD munch out at 1:09am!

  • Matt N.

    My birthday is 4/20 and its fuckin awesome!


  • i like it

    i think i did almost everything there cause i get high alot it feels good

  • pepe

    Im from Toronto. I have been smoking since 1999.Im still smoking.Everyday,every hour and minute.Nonstop.
    But you know what ? it all about , what you expect from your life.I do not expectin being a lazzy asshole and retarted brain.I can see more cleary that weed had fucked up my life and it will countinue if i never say stop.My expectations are different and moreover , to being close to my goals is unfortunetly not possible with non-working brain.Life is full with permenant hapinesses.Its worth to try

  • bobby

    hahah i love how practically 75% of the comments are from people who are high and just found this randomly through google and decided to read the whole article including all the comments just to leave one that makes absolutely no sense. haha im so baked right now but rofl i just thinks thats so fucking hilarious cause all high people are on the same level, but my MAIN point of this was i agree with so many of the points: the paranoia, forgettfulness, forgotten movies, munchies…fuck i am a total pothead. peace to all. happy toking (:

  • Cindy

    You Know You’re A Pothead…if

    You get an idea so brilliant you are sure it will change the world. You manage to find a pencil and write it down. The next day you read what you wrote and it says, “there’s a funny smell in the room.”

    *Borrowed from: A child’s garden of grass (the official handbook for marijuana users)

  • when you read an article entitled “You Know You’re A Pothead…”

  • amag

    my brother told me im a pot head and so i went online searching for what exactly a pot head is and all of these describe me so i guess im a pot head…damn this is stressing me out….i guess ill light one up…peace hahahaha

  • wow was only like one thing on that list that i can say i dont do or have not done.. i love it!!

  • ummmmm

    … when people at work say you look weird the one day you go to work straight because you had nothing to smoke that morning

    ..when the only exam you fail is the one you wrote straight

    … when you haven’t been able to smoke even once in 2 years and every day think about when the next time will be 🙁

  • Gabi

    You know you’re a weed head if you are broke and jobless but can still find a way to smoke all day everyday.

  • Felicia Nelson

    OMG!!! SMiley Face… Anna Farris.. if you smoke weed and you haven’t seen it.. you have not lived, I promise.

  • bluntman

    when you tell your friends how high you didn’t get

  • juanita

    when u tought for a second that the brown bag on the floor was an effin dog

  • Dan

    “They know man, they know.” I laughed right out loud at that one.

  • pothead

    I am a frequent smoker of cannabis. I smoke it everyday, all day (if i have no other responsibilities i can’t handle high), and I found your list to be ridiculously stereotypical, and far from an actual experience of a pot head.

    If you are a pot head, you cannot smell weed from a mile away. In fact, you probably won’t be able to smell if it was right next to you in somebodies pocket. It is called tolerance!

    Everything on your list can be attributed to a regular person. For instance, if you know how to make a bong, that just means your intelligent, and clever! If you understand why it should be legalized, again any intelligent, rational person should be able to understand that shit.

    Stereotypes are funny, but only when they are true. The majority of your stereotypes, are NOT true. Do you even smoke cannabis? The only thing I would say is genuine is the “people are watching me. they know man, they know.” Even this, however, can be attributed to a handful of many other drugs.

    So in conclusion… fail.

  • Froggy

    I’m sorry, either your a narrow minded little twirp or you’ve never smoke a jay in your life. First of all, it’s proven that weed is not physically addictive, although it can be mentally addictive just like smokes. Also, when I see cop’s burning down crop’s on the news, I don’t shed a tear, I get pissed off, the fact that our politician’s smoke it and don’t see the fact that monitor and control works is fucking insane, especially since such fucked up body wrecking drugs like bzb pills and 4mmc where legal up till around 2 months ago in Europe. Secondly, if I did move to Canada, yes I would get a growers licence, but god, the scenery is beautiful. And the fact that Amsterdam is meant to be full of idiotic tourist’s who only have the aim to get stoned instead of enjoying it’s culture and amazing theme parks pisses me off. Yes, everyone has their prefered ways of smoking, shoot through or joint for me, but if anyone passes a joint because it’s not the way they smoke, it’s scabby, unless you smoke it through a pipe ’cause you don’t smoke tobacco. And if the only stoner movie’s you know are Dazed and Confuse and Half Baked, you are sadly lacking in film knowledge, classic’s like cheech and chong go up in smoke or cat soup springs to mind. And also I would like to point out the fact that this article is highly stereotypical.

  • High Driver

    You know you’re a pothead when you wait for the stop sign to change colors. Then realize it’s a stop sign, not a stop light. Oh god, how long have I’ve been sitting here?

  • kingofthecrop

    you know you are not a pothead when you dont know the difference between hemp and cannabis.

  • kingofthecrop

    you are also know you are not a pothead when think marijuana should be decriminalized. you know you are a pothead if you know the reasons why it should stay illegal.

  • JC

    “i feel like a piece of butter melting …on top of a nice pile of flap jacks” lol pineapple express best movie ever

  • Jill

    I know this is a common one, but I have done it more than once. Stopping at a stop sign and waiting for it to turn green. Or stopping at a green light and waiting for it to turn red, so I can stop?? Wait I am stopped Im supposed to go…

  • JO JO

    shit i love being high…. fuk weed is so good… omg… i fukin high like this bong is soi GOOD….. IM HUNGRY…

  • freakonaleash

    lmao!!! to 76 / 77
    you must get some shit smoke if you don’t get the point.

  • wide white

    You know your a pothead when the only time you hit people up is to throw 5’s

    When You Know What Store Has The Cheapest Dutches Blunts , ect

    When you look in ciggerette packs for roaches

    When You Blow Your Whole Pay Check Pick up wieght try and sell it but end up smoking it all

  • turestonersarehere

    You know your a stoner when you use big words and don’t even know the meaning of it..

  • truestongersarehere

    You know your a stoner when you start sounding like the cookie monster… I’M HUNGRY!!

  • truestongersarehere

    The only people who would truly come up with things for you know your a stoner when.. but really everyone here is a stoner.

  • truestongersarehere

    You know your a pothead when you’re to lazy to get up and get something but when it comes to food your up and ready to go.

  • truestongersarehere

    You know your a pothead when you drop your shit you could care less, but if it’s your weed your down on your hands and knee’s to get it..

  • truestongersarehere

    You know your a pothead when you put your phone on top of your car, forget about it, and drive away..

  • truestongersarehere

    You know your a pothead when you have uncontrolable twitches..

  • truestongersarehere

    You know you are a stoner when you cant come up with you know you are a stoner when facts.

  • truestongersarehere

    the only reason we keep coming up with you know you are a stoner when because we are stoners and it gives us something to do, since we ran out.

  • truestongersarehere

    You know your a pothead when your playing a game with a wireless controler and when the battery dies you ask did someone unplug me?.

  • truestongersarehere

    You know your a pothead when your looking for your mom but only to ask her were your stash has went.

  • Kush so strong you can smell me comin’

    “You know “Wake and Bake” isn’t about cooking.”

    “You know cigars as “Philly’s” and it’s a hassle that they come with tobacco inside.”

    HA, so true.
    Had a pretty badass wake and bake this morning.
    & blunts would be way faster to roll if it wasn’t for that damn tobacco. 🙂
    I could use that time getting baked.

  • nug in the rug

    you know your a pothead when your every 20$ dollars you have gose to a gram befor u even knew u had it..
    you know your a pothead when your at the drive threw at toco bell at 1am.
    and you know your a pothead when u r smoking a bowl. while reading this and geeking out.. lol

  • pothead420

    ive LITTERLY done everything on that list lol..man, that shit was just buggin me out..did u spy on me? any1 wanna talk bout pot? or sen pics.. [Personal contact info deleted]

  • mr.whackyweed

    you know your a pothead when you wake up early at 4:20 am habit

  • BlazedOut

    You know you’re a pothead when you think random shit that happens synchronizes with the music you’re listening to

  • smokemorecones

    @BlazedOut haha happens to me heaps 🙂

  • johnn

    great article! funny as hell! and yet so damn true!

  • pawel

    lol this shit was so funny it like evey pothead thinks disame

  • ricko

    froggy = moron

    loved this btw

  • reefar

    “I tried making sense of it, and then I realized I should be trying to make sense as to why I was even trying to make sense… ” LIVE IT.

  • Stoned Cold Crazy

    You know youre a pothead when you freak out over losing the ganj and spend an hour…or two looking for it only to realize you had smoked it just prior to losing it.

  • Bri

    Holy shit. You know you’re a pothead when you can’t even leave a comment on a forum like this on 4/20.

  • Cradle Bear Dope

    You know your a pothead when, sometimes when paranoid you think its always better to overexplain things then to underexplain things, more so then when just chilled high

  • lew from the uk (england)

    u no ur a stoner when:
    1. if u just look at your friend he knows its time 2 roll a doob
    2. one is never enough
    3.u can eat the most amount of food you have ever eaten, smoke 2, then eat it all again
    4. you’ve forgotten some of the best times you have had
    5. mario kart is god

  • blezzy puffin

    you know your a pot head when you took the time to read this whole thing.

  • This is so flipping hilarious. I’m printing it out and putting it on my wall.

  • Phil E. Drifter

    You know you’re a pothead when you pull up to a stop sign, stop, and wait for it to change colors before going again.

  • J888

    I think this refers more to stereotypical American potheads.. as a stoner living in Amsterdam for 5 years now, I find it hard to relate to any of this yankee crap.

  • hehe

    this article wins. I qualify by 100% of this list.

  • You know you’re a pothead when you see footage of oil soaked brown pelicans and think they are seals.

  • JOhnny ROtten

    You know you’re a pot head when…Hey did you guys see that fucking fat bird fly past the window? Nature is cool.

  • chris-arz

    deffinatly have stopped at a stop sign and waited for it to change colors. but that was back in the day lol. good shit.

  • D.Greene

    more like “common things that everybody knows is stereotypical pot head behavior” :-/

  • amandacoberly

    you put “smoke” twice in the names for pot.

  • @louisishung

    @dgreene – so common things that sterotypically let you know you are a pot head? AKA you know your a pot head when? lol

  • EmilyLovesBlunts

    you know you’re a Stoner when your lighting…hold on..k im good alright…a bowl while reading this lol…and you know your friends are Stoners when you are on your way taking them to church and they are putting in eyedrops and putting on makeup and smell-good spray on lol

  • EmilyLovesBlunts

    hahaha also you know your stoned when your speeding and try to stop at a blinking yellow light…or if you see invisible cars at night lol damn

  • EmilyLovesBlunts

    O and you kno your a stoner when you are taking resin hits because you think you jus smoked all the weed…then 10 mins later after cleaning every piece you had and smoking the resin you realize….Omg whay are we smoking resin when we have weed right there…idk…both geek for ten mins then smoke the rest of the weed….haha damn

  • EmilyLovesBlunts

    you kno your a stoner when you keep remembering things from times youve smoked then putting them on here then realize you have like 4 posts…lol Congratulations Im Stoned Your Stoned We are all Stoned hahaha Love It Live It Smoke It

  • mikestephens

    you know your a pot head when your high and your reading this

  • Rob

    You know your a stoner when your parents ask you if a plate or bowl is dirty or your finished and you reply, ya its cashed

  • Ashleigh

    it’s like you know me or something man

  • Che

    You know your a stoner when your the only person up and walking to 7/11 at 3AM.

  • kwannggg

    you know youre a stoner when you’ve hid weed from yourself just so you’d have some for later..

  • Arsemole

    you know your a pothead when youve been poppin toots an stumbling for 3 an a half hours

  • JtotheRad

    And they say we can’t remember anything but look at all of the things you (congrats on not being someone who just thinks these things) and every other pothead/stoner/awesome person know and remember on a daily basis.

  • blastyxd

    My motto is: smoke it when you got it, but then… i always got it 😛

  • snapSHOTplus4

    when you smell weed after ejaculation and your girlfriend tells you that your nut tastes like marijuana, thats when you KNOW youre a freakin stoner

  • adam

    you know your a pothead when you stare off into space for long lengths of time.

  • Pino

    Wow. This is too true.

  • MongWithABong

    Shiiiiitttt…….. Man, i giggled for ages with that shit! Heh eh he 😀

  • Orange Kush Bro

    i may be a few years late but that doesnt mean i cant represent whatss near and dear to me…ORANGE KUSH can’t get enough of it im on day 103 of smoking everyday!

  • Weed

    I vote for California too . they have good stuff around there 🙂

  • delia

    i love being a pot head 🙂

  • Ha brilliant list. Ye know your a stoner when you roach both ends of a spliff anyway! I’m sitting here looking at it and can’t stop laughing long enough to fix it!

  • iknow im a pothead becuz when i write a poem for my gurl, i have to smoke a fat blunt to get all my ideas . 🙂


    in the last one where you have 50 different names you’ve repeated heaps of them so you need to come up with some more!

  • luke

    Funny as all hell man right on

  • Matt

    You know your a pothead when you find a bag of weed out of nowhere and then smoke it.

  • acidwave

    You know you’re a pot head when the guy on your right has the pipe, and starts telling a really awesome story, but the whole time you are thinking “Dear God, will he please hit that and pass?”

  • acidwave

    also, you know you’re a stoner if, when you are out of cash and weed, you and all your friends clean out your car and find a gram or more total in half full bags you lost, stray nugs, shake etc.

  • Frito

    You put “Smoke” twice in the list of different names for cannabis lol

  • Anon

    You know your a pothead when you read this in 2011

  • GroundThug

    You know your a stoner if you look up if you’re a stoner or not.

  • calculon

    You know you’re an American stoner if…

  • anthony

    when you planned your life around it by making bongs for a living

  • concerned pothead

    you know your a pothead when you realize the list of names for weed was missing a few of your favorites (trees, ganjawana, pinner, green gold)

  • MrFour20

    Fort Collins has the best weed after Humboldt hands down.

  • sonia g

    witty as f*ck love it

  • mary jane

    You know you’re a stoner when the bottom of every lighter you own is charred black.

  • dmac

    lol why nevada?

  • Brandon Blackwell :D

    You know your a pot head when you look up to see if your favorite stuff has been banned or back on he market.
    Btw dragons fire hurts a lot & shock extreme is the best 😀

  • bluedreamistheshit

    you know your a pothead when…. your high and you think about how a conversation with one of your friends will go i.e (in mind) hey jim
    hey bro
    dude im high
    dude me too ……. i need to go talk to jim!

  • lit-up

    keep em comming bro! smoke em if you got em and if you dont that sux

  • cali


  • SmokyMCpot

    You know when your a pot head if u always bring up “Pineapple Express” or “Half Baked” for no reason

  • SmokyMCpot

    You know your a pothead if you sell your only bowl for weed money and then after u buy it u forgot you sold your bowl

  • 315stoner

    you know your a pot head when you can clean every crevices of your grinder and come out with enough kief to cake onto a fat bong pack 🙂 keep smoking!

  • Fyrehed

    I especially liked “Every idea you ever have you need to write down.” followed by
    “You forget to write down every idea you ever have.”

    Very, very true.

  • wazzgoodweed

    Kinda have a problem with the one about rules? If youre a pothead you never “have had enough” well at least I havent…

  • MaryjaneMarryme

    You know your a pothead when your’e broke and your’e willing to scrape out the resin in your piece and you smoke it.

  • julianna

    I literally loled for 5 minutes after reading this one…..

    You can’t believe someone “smoked without you.”

  • PackinMadBongs

    great blog man, but you forgot a few things.

    you know your a pot head if you smoke alone.

    you know your a pot head if its night time, you walk into a room and turn the light on and have to stop and think what you went in there for only to walk out and walk back in and turn the light off by accident.

    you know your a pot head if you blaze up and you go on stumbleupon.com to burn a few minutes, everyday.

    and last but not least…
    you know your a pot head when you smoke TWO bowl packs out of a one hitter in your car on your way to go skate!!!


  • Hank

    You know your a stoner when you hold on to bus tickets and business cards you come across, to later be used as a roach

  • Jacob

    Hahah, all of these comments are from late at night, of high people being bored on google. You know your a pothead when you feel more normal high then sober.

  • SewsconedRightNaow

    Having read this, I believe that every person who has commented on this was stoned. Also did anyone notice that there isn’t anyone having some stupid online bickering? Yeah.. we’re all so chilled 🙂

  • tabitha Button

    haha you might be a pothead if huhh is the main word in your vocab orif your 3 years late

  • canned tuna

    I had one that hadn’t been mentioned at all…I forgot it after I got to the bottom of the page that prompted me to remember it. I think it was another one of the traffic ones…but I just…don’t remember. O.o

  • javier

    that was just completely me lol

  • HippyLove

    This shit just crakced me up…you fucking potheads..(: It straight man. I dont think i’d be the same person if I never smoked.

  • Clockwise Rotation

    Mary J isnt a drug , it’s an Herb. Smoke enough & it’ll take away all your problems.. or at least make u not give af about ur problems. Ahhhh green

    Btw- ur a pothead when you’ve heard someone say who wants to smoke & your hand was the first one up.

  • dfghj

    You know youre a pot head when this gives you those good chills because you know you do all of this.

  • Jay

    I’ll pass this site on to friends.

  • blunt trauma

    you know your a stoner when u jus relized u dnt wanna read the rest of the article

  • lightitupyo

    f’n hysterical man! good work! smoke em if you gots em

  • Blake

    You know when your a stoner When there’s 7 people in the car and everyone has a piece and bud

  • Robert Marley

    My mother always told me, “If you’re not a head… you’re behind”.

  • space and tyme

    yep..space is the place in time when you free your mind..or is this B.S..haha

  • space and tyme

    dude i’m so fucked
    this shit is awesome…toke me in heaven

  • space and tyme

    wow, damn are the times good 🙂 haha dude what happened, oh…that happened.. your out?! noooooooo!!!! jk escape your mind in space… nice toking to you haha 😉

  • itsallgood

    you know you’re a pothead when you read all of the above and said: “yeah dude, so true”

  • asdf

    SMT.. its called dope because of dopamine, learn something about the origin of the word before you post stupid sh!t

  • mary jane

    You need to add ” you know your deffinently a stoner if your smoking while reading this”

  • Eric

    you know your a pothead when you use the phrase “speak your mind”

  • dystrag

    You know your’e a stoner if…I think I may be a little late

  • Smokethedevilsplant

    walked right into a trap XD
    “You write down every idea you’ve ever had”
    “You forget to write down every idea you’ve ever had”

  • L1QU1D

    All about the chronic…

  • Pothead101

    You know you’re a pothead when you walk into a room to do something and then forget what you were gonna do. Cx Haha

  • TGOD

    You know ur a pothead when u live wiz khalifa

  • kushhhh

    you know your a pot head when..
    you eat meat… when you’re a vegitarian!

  • Firelungs

    You know your a Stoner when you see the same name you gave to your bong on a Stoner forum and are disappointed that your amazing name wasn’t as original as you previously believed (you have named everything you’ve ever smoked out of. Kingbong)

  • ScoobyDoobie


  • MaryJaneDoe

    I knew 25 of those words but man i really wanna know… how did you forget “bud”

    Also re: the nickname, it’s “best bud” for me

  • wilmy2awesome

    so me

  • djperbear

    i love that you repeated some of the weed names towards the end. you must’ve been stoned haha good blog, dude. much appreciated 🙂

  • zoie

    Holy shit I’m a total stoner!

  • potcast

    They said reefer twice

  • Matt

    Awesome blog dude! I love weed, the world would be a better place if it was compromised of stoners and people that didn’t smoke but understood weed.