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Xbox 360 Launch: A Poem

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November 22nd has come,
and I sit outside extremely numb.

Xbox 360 is here,
bringing with it all kinds of holiday cheer.

As crowds stand outside in the rain,
we all begin to realize this is a real pain.

They come from the north, south, east and west,
all to be first to claim the system they consider the best.

With gaming power like no other,
no one else will be allowed to touch one, not even my little brother.

The doors opened at nine,
while I scramble to get mine.

I am five people too late,
and someone else has snagged the bait.

I rush into another store that carries games and toys,
hoping to beat out all the rest of the boys.

It seems everyone here has already claimed their prize,
obvious due to all the cries.

The people yelled, “But we paid for it, games and all!”
and their voices echoed through the mall.

“I’m sorry, but you don’t have to be so loud,”
shouts the clerk over the ever-growing crowd.

I’m ready to give up soon,
but suddenly there’s a large boom.

Someone has fired off a gunshot,
attempting to scare people in the parking lot

A kid drops his shiny new box in fear,

then begins breaking down in tears.

A crowd makes a mad dash,
trying to snag that little kids stash.

There was this woman unfortunately named Annabelle.
She snagged the console and ran like hell.

I begin to think it isn’t worth it,
but someone else makes me think a bit.

“Why don’t you just try eBay?” says a kid,
“there you can try and bid!”

What a great idea I thought.
surely this would be an easy way to get this console bought.

I log on to find many on a list,
each one making me more and more pissed.

At $1000 for just one,
I realize it must be done.

I must convince myself it’s true:
I have no chance at getting one and it’s time to get a clue.

This is simply not worth it,
not even one tiny bit

Maybe other stores will have them December 3rd,
then I can try to fly over there quicker than a bird.

Parents you can try,
but there will be few opportunities to buy.

It’s all because of Bill Gates,
a person many gamers are beginning to hate.

I’ll most likely see everyone after the New Year,
when I can walk up to a register and buy one without any fear.

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About Matt Paprocki

Matt Paprocki has critiqued home media and video games for 13 years and is the reviews editor for Pulp365.com. His current passion project is the technically minded DoBlu.com. You can read Matt's body of work via his personal WordPress blog, and follow him on Twitter @Matt_Paprocki.
  • Bravo! Bravo! This shall be circulated far and wide:)

  • sal m

    for the life of me i cannot figure out how microsoft allowed this release situation to be handled in this manner OR thought that creating a false shortage situation would help them out. sure in the short run they may get some more buzz out of this situation, but they are microsoft for crying out loud and shouldn’t have to resort to cheap tactics to drum up interest.
    whether planned or not, those responsible for this fiasco should lose their jobs.

  • The retailers aren’t complaining – most of them requested more than a 150% of their pre-orders, and got about 70%

  • Jordan posted this over at Breaking Windows and it adds a little to this wondeful poem:

    You left out how it was the Grinch behind all the shortpacking.

    “And all the Gamers down in Gamerville
    were very sick and very ill

    for the sight of empty gamestore shelves
    was like some kind of gaming hell

    while up in his cave, cackling with delight
    was the wicked green Grinch, quite enjoying the sight!

    “I stole all their XBoxes,” he gutterly growled
    “and their games and peripherals!” he happily howled

    “Now I’ll add quite an insult to their sore injury!”
    he said to himself, chuckling louder with glee.

    And rubbing his hands, he went down to his room
    to his wicked green iMac, to seal the Gamers’ doom.

    “This plan is most brilliant, I really must say!”
    said the Grinch, as he began to log into eBay…

  • PICK OF THE WEEK ::: A section editor pointed your way as a pick of the 11-19/11-25 week. Click HERE to find out why.

    Cheers. Temple

  • I think that, even if they didn’t intentionally create a shortage, they probably didn’t take action to prevent one. The coverage surrounding the ‘shortage’ of a hot product is a Christmas tradition, and the toy fortunate enough to be both desirable and unavailable gets lot of free media, and what I’d heard someone else describe as a ‘mystique of desirability.’