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With a Name Like Shithouse Rat, it Has to be Good!

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IT’S BIG! IT’S BOLD! IT WHITENS! IT BRIGHTENS! IT SLICES! IT DICES! It’s the cyber-sensation that’s sweeping the nation! It’s hours of fun for the whole family! It’s the amazing:

ADVERTISING SLOGAN GENERATOR!!!!

FOLKS, LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT this revolutionary little tool. It’s so easy to operate, even a child can do it! Here’s how it works:

All you do is enter a word or phrase (like your name, the name of your blog, your favorite politician, or anything you like), and the Advertising Slogan Generator will generate incredible ad slogans for you in big bold headlines. Just press the “sloganize” button for a brand new slogan, oven fresh from the generator. Comes out perfect every time!

Created through the wonders of cyberspace technology, the Advertising Slogan Generator has so many uses. In your camper or R.V., it’ll keep the kids amused for hours as they sloganize every dirty word they can think of! At work, enter your boss’s name or company logo to see how many embarrassing slogans you can create and e-mail to co-workers! Great at parties too.

HOW OFTEN HAVE YOU ENDURED THIS? You’re on a road trip, and the kids are getting restless. They’re screaming and fighting, and you’re about to have a psychotic break and drive into the nearest tree. But wait–it’s Advertising Slogan Generator to the rescue! Just log on and the kids can have fun and be creative too! (Laptop with cross-country wireless capability not included). Instead of crawling up your ass, they’ll be busy coming up with gems like these:

A Fart’s too Wet Without One.

Break me off a Piece of that Poop.

Poppin Fresh Boogers.

Now, isn’t that amazing? But wait–there’s more!

CALLING ALL AMERICANS! WANT TO SHOW YOUR SUPPORT FOR THE PARTY OF YOUR CHOICE? The Advertising Slogan Generator makes it easy to come up with great bumperstickers like these:

A Day without Dubya is Like a Day without Sunshine.

Choosy Mothers Choose Cheney.

Mama Mia, That’s One Spicy Hillary Clinton!

Wait til We Get our John Kerry on You!

ATTENTION ALL BLOGGERS! Scraping the bottom of the idea barrel and need a quick and easy post? Then the Advertising Slogan Generator is for you. Or maybe you’re just starting a blog and need a name that will really make the bloggerati sit up and take notice! Well, if you’ve got the time, we’ve got the Advertising Slogan Generator!

Let’s say you’re thinking of naming your new blog “Daily Musings.” All fine and good, but how about putting a little spin on it? Well, make it an Advertising Slogan Generator night and come up with great blog titles or subtitles like these:

America’s Most Trusted Daily Musings.

The Incredible, Edible Daily Musings.

Only the Crumbliest, Flakiest Daily Musings.

See? Instant bloggertizing!

HERE’S SOME OF THE SENSATIONAL SLOGANS I generated for my blog, Shithouse rat! No need to add anything–it’s a whole post in itself!

It’s not TV. It’s Shithouse Rat.

Have Shithouse Rat Your Way.

Ding Dong! Shithouse Rat Calling!

Things Go better with Shithouse Rat.

Shithouse Rat–Australian for Beer.

All the Shithouse Rat that’s Fit to Print.

I Can’t believe it’s Not Shithouse rat!

It Takes a Tough Man to Make a Tender Shithouse Rat.

I Liked the Shithouse Rat so much, I Bought the Company!

Got Shithouse Rat?

Reach Out and Touch Shithouse Rat.

You’ve Got Questjons, We’ve Got Shithouse Rat.

Snap! Crackle! Shithouse Rat!

Shithouse Rat, the Other White Meat.

Strong Enough for a Man, Made for a Shithouse Rat.

There’s no Wrong Way to Eat a Shithouse Rat.

All You Add is Shithouse Rat.

Let your Shithouse Rat do the Walking.

Lipsmackin’, Thirstquenchin’, Motivatin’, Goodbuzzin’, Cooltalkin’, Highwalkin’, Fastlivin’, Evergivin’, Coolfizzin’ Shithouse Rat.

Remember, the Advertising Slogan Generator is not available in any store! So act now! And remember: tell ‘em Shithouse Rat sent you!

THE ADVERTISING SLOGAN GENERATOR. IT’S WHAT’S FOR DINNER.

Previously posted on Shithouse rat.

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About Elvira Black

  • http://freewayjam.blogspot.com uao

    I stumbled across this by accident, and being a sucker for such gadgets, I experimented with it a bit.

    This would have been a cool device if it actually “generated” slogans based on keywords you enter.

    However, all it does is plug your keyword into an already existing slogan, that’s been written (and copyrighted) I presume by someone else. So nothing is really “generated”, alas.

    Using “Blogcritics” I get:

    My Anti-Drug is Blogcritics
    There’s Only One Blogcritics
    Kills All Known Blogcritics – Dead.
    Bet You Can’t Eat Blogcritics
    Blogcritics. It’s What’s For Dinner.

    I gave up after that. The cast of the Apprentice could do a better job.

    Sorry; can’t share the enthusiasm. I’ll give it a 2 out of 10.

  • http://www.elitistpig.com Dave Nalle

    Their ebay feedback generator uses the same principle and is actually quite useful. I think 90% of the people on ebay may actually be using the thing.

    As for the ad slogan generator, mine was:

    “promotes active anal rape!”

    Not sure how well that will sell.

    Dave

  • http://elvirablack.blogspot.com/ Elvira Black

    uao:

    The gizmo doesn’t seem completely random to me–it seems to work better on two-word phrases for some reason. But here’s a few for you:

    IT NEEDN’T BE HELL WITH UAO.

    PROBABLY THE BEST UAO IN THE WORLD.

    UAO: IT LOOKS GOOD ON YOU.

    Hey, I’m sold on you already! After all, YOU CAN DO IT WHEN YOU UAO IT.

  • http://elvirablack.blogspot.com/ Elvira Black

    Dave, Dave, Dave–you must have been looking at some nasty-ass X-rated version. Now don’t these sound more flattering?:

    A TOUGH DAVE NALLE TO FOLLOW.

    HAPPINESS IS DAVE NALLE SHAPED.

    GOT A DAVE NALLE? YOU’RE IN LUCK.

    See? My generator would never say such nasty things. The most off-color thing it said about you was that you were NAUGHTY, BUT DAVE NALLE.