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Where Have All the Good Men Gone? As Far Away As They Can Get

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In the February 19 Wall Street Journal, feminist writer Kay S. Hymowitz wrote a disjointed article where she argues that too many men in their 20s are living in a new kind of extended adolescence. She says that single women have no one to marry (an astonishingly odd statement from a feminist, but moving on) then adds,

Women are the first sex. They graduate from college in greater numbers (among Americans ages 25 to 34, 34% of women now have a bachelor’s degree but just 27% of men), and they have higher GPAs. As most professors tell it, they also have more confidence and drive. These strengths carry women through their 20s, when they are more likely than men to be in grad school and making strides in the workplace. In a number of cities, they are even out-earning their brothers and boyfriends. Still, for these women, one key question won’t go away: Where have the good men gone? Their male peers often come across as aging frat boys, maladroit geeks or grubby slackers…

She slams “shallow” young men responsible for an entire generation of women being single and miserable.

She ignores the fact that yes, while many young males are spending their 20s playing video games in their parents’ living room, others are starting companies, becoming doctors, and forging careers. Only they’re doing it single and this curiously seems to have infuriated the feminists.

I’m bringing all this up because while preparing teenagers and college students for adulthood is my mission, I have two successful sons who just shake their heads when their mother mentions marriage. As we’ve been married forever, and they know how much their mother and I love each other, their ambivalent attitude about marriage was puzzling. But it’s becoming less so. Six months ago I heard Gloria Steinem in a speech to college students blame white men for all the world’s oppression of women, conveniently forgetting that black- and brown-skinned radical Muslims were throwing acid in young girls’ faces while white males were in Iraq and Afghanistan attempting to end their repression. But that narrative didn’t fit with the feminist narrative.

Now we have Kay Hymowitz bemoaning what appears to me to a feminist victory. Men have been driven out of college, graduate school, and corporations by a variety of laws while feminists have dismissed men as useless. Here is just a brief sampling of the pleasant things feminists have said about men in the past:

“We’ve begun to raise daughters more like sons… but few have the courage to raise our sons more like our daughters.” – Gloria Steinem

“I wish someone would have told me that, just because I’m a girl, I don’t have to get married.” – Marlo Thomas

“Women are the only oppressed group in our society that lives in intimate association with their oppressors.” – Evelyn Cunningham

“The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it.” – Roseanne Barr

“I’m tough, I’m ambitious, and I know exactly what I want. If that makes me a b*t?h, okay.” – Madonna Ciccone

“Women’s chains have been forged by men, not by anatomy.” – Estelle R. Ramey

“Some of us are becoming the men we wanted to marry.” – Gloria Steinem

“I think, therefore I’m single.” – Lizz Winstead

“Several men I can think of are as capable, as smart, as funny, as compassionate, and as confused—as remarkable you might say—as most women.” – Jane Howard

“Men weren’t really the enemy—they were fellow victims suffering from an outmoded masculine mystique that made them feel unnecessarily inadequate when there were no bears to kill.” – Betty Friedan

“To me, “sexual freedom” means freedom from having to have sex.” – Lily Tomlin

“Any intelligent woman who reads the marriage contract, and then goes into it, deserves all the consequences.” – Isadora Duncan

“Men are irrelevant. Women are happy or unhappy, fulfilled or unfulfilled, and it has nothing to do with men.” – Fay Weldon

“A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle.” – Gloria Steinem

“Husbands and fathers are now optional, and the qualities of character men once needed to play their roles—fortitude, stoicism, courage, fidelity—are obsolete, even a little embarrassing.” – Kay S. Hymowitz

And she wonders why men are passing on marriage. My question is, why do these women even want marriage? When did they decide marriage wasn’t a battlefield? Kay’s final recommendation is that women go to sperm banks, and get some DNA “without the troublesome man.” That’s great —an entire generation of fatherless children raised by women who when they are at their wits’ end will have nobody to blame but themselves.

It seems these same feminists who castigated the idea of marriage have now changed their minds. Only, their choices are incredibly limited. The slackers living with their parents are having too much fun to get married and the future male doctors and CEOs are too busy to put up with their nonsense.

Dads are supposed to show their daughters what to look for in a man. If, somehow, their daughters have gotten the strange idea that honor and integrity and fidelity in a man aren’t to be valued, then honestly, either dads aren’t doing their job or their mothers have gone over the deep end in the name of feminism.

The bottom line is that when we teach our children to devalue the other sex, we will always accomplish our mission: our children will wind up alone.

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About Harry H Harrison Jr.

  • http://ruvysroost.blogspot.com Ruvy

    Great article!

    Whiny lonely women is what you wind up when you have a society filled with raging angry women screaming, “my body, my self!” They’ve got their body, and now that they’ve finally woken up to the fact that their body is a vessel for something more than their selfish desires, all they have is themselves.

    Good on ‘em! Loneliness is one hell of a teacher. And it is the teacher they deserve. I pulled this from Facebook on the same theme. When morals go down the tube you get a sick society. Norway is part of Europe’s sick society. America is a sick society. In Norway, and the rest of Europe, women are suffering gang-rape and honor killings. That is on the way in America.

    Enjoy it! You’ve earned it – the old fashioned way – by kicking your morals and your values out the window.

  • http://thingsalongtheway.blogspot.com/ Cindy

    Only a misogynist (whether self-evident or not) could find fault with this statement:

    “We’ve begun to raise daughters more like sons… but few have the courage to raise our sons more like our daughters.” – Gloria Steinem

    • Chris Horner

      Shut up, calling people a ‘misogynist’ is a typical insult from a boring self-satisfied feminist.

    • John

      Yes but the difference is most women and men can accept and see a heterosexual “masculine” woman as acceptable and/or attractive (depending on the person). Of course with the exception that she looks exactly like a man then heterosexual men won’t be attracted to her. When a heterosexual “feminine” man comes into play he is automatically assumed to be “gay” and a “sissy”. Women aren’t attracted to them, but they may accept them as friends. I have seen women break up with a man because he was sensitive and showed emotions and caring which are more feminine features. I’m not saying that men shouldn’t be caring or sensitive but when it comes to the point of being feminine they attract a rare few women. This will also lead to a woman or many women being single if a lot more men were to be raised like daughters. Though I agree there are qualities that both genders can benefit from having (like being raised in a way where sex has some meaning and isn’t the prize in some game of manipulating the other sex for a one night stand. Maybe holding out for somebody that really means somehting to them).

  • http://thingsalongtheway.blogspot.com/ Cindy

    FEMINISM IS FOR EVERYONE! HULK PENIS NOT THREATENED BY ANTI-PATRIARCHAL ACTIVISM; SENSITIVE HULK SOUL SUPPORT CHANGE!

    ~ Feminist Hulk

  • very true

    it is more like, where have all the good women gone? so many nasty women out there now with their SHIT DON’T STINK OF AN ATTITUDE PROBLEM, and are so very nasty to talk too.