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Watch Out: Imaginary Heroes is a Bad Movie!

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Warning, contains spoilers, but this movie sucks, so don’t worry about it.

The preview for Imaginary Heroes is false advertising. It made it look like the movie would be fun. It’s 90% depressing with occasional moments of interest. It’s being marketed as an amusing romp. Imaginary Heroes more closely resembles Ordinary People, The Ice Storm or American Beauty, but without the intensity or importance of those movies. It contains repeated scenes of minors involved with violence and drug abuse.

Imaginary Heroes has a story to tell, but it tells it in such a boring dragged out way that it is hard to care. Many of the themes have been done to death. It’s hard to see why the movie was made or why such talented people as Sigourney Weaver gave it the time of day. It’s about an alienated suburban family. Honestly. So maybe you’re thinking there’s some fresh amusing take on it. Not even. Surburban Mom is a secret drug user. Following a trauma, Surburban Dad stops going to work and sits at a bus stop all day. Surburban Kid takes drugs with the Neighbor Kid. There was some infidelity. And it goes on and on like that. A loss is dealt with in an alienated way with all family members going into their own worlds. Someone just discovered suburbia. Someone with modest gifts but good connections. There were a few really amusing moments in the movie, like a speech by a high school valedictorian in which she says how she really feels. They could make an outstanding ten minute reel from this movie, and they kind of did with the trailer.

So what is this movie really about? Why was it made? The key might be a scene between Surburban Kid and Neighbor Boy. During a drugged out stupor they have sex in one of their beds. Given the stream of events in this movie, it seems a minor one at the time. Maybe this whole trite, tired, movie is someone’s way of announcing something. It wouldn’t be the first time.

So, if I’m right, this movie contains one brief announcement of importance to the filmmaker’s friends and ten minutes of amusing material. This is what they charge us seven dollars to watch.

Most movies theaters will give you your money back if you leave during the first fifteen or thirty minutes of the movie itself. (The time limit varies from theater to theater.) If you want to see Sigourney Weaver in a really good movie, rent Heartbreakers.

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