The other day, I was thinking how weird it is that the singing voice of the '80s Hasbro/Sunbow pop singer character Jem--whose old animated series of the same name is currently one of the Hub cable channel's most-watched programs--actually belonged to musician Britta Phillips of Luna and Dean & Britta fame (was Gillian Jacobs' Community character Britta named after her?).
After the releases of the Hasbro-inspired (and not-so-good) Transformers and G.I. Joe live-action movies and the filming of an upcoming Peter Berg-directed movie based on the Hasbro-owned property Battleship, what's next? A movie based on Jem? According to a 2009 Pajiba post, that's exactly what the screenwriter who penned the High School Musical TV-movies has been trying to get off the ground for Universal.
The only things I remember about Jem are its tagline "Truly Outrageous!" and a sequence where the show's evil band the Misfits--which has nothing to do with the Misfits I'm more familiar with--sang the quintessential '80s number "Winning Is Everything." Because the only Hasbro toy lines/cartoon shows my younger self was into involved death and destruction, Jem was one of those Things from the '80s I Never Cared for, so a Jem movie--especially one that I assume will be done in the style of the often-imitated Glee and the annoyingly squeaky-clean High School Musical--doesn't interest me much.
The only kind of Jem movie that would interest me would be one that's done as
a Bridesmaids-esque female ensemble comedy about has-been rockers in the vein of Spinal Tap, Stephen Rea's Still Crazy and Rainn Wilson's much-maligned The Rocker (and this is the point in the post where the under-18 and mostly female target audience that's currently enjoying Jem reruns on The Hub starts to doze off). If I made the movie, I would have set it long after Jem and the Holograms broke up.
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