Van Helsing

Author: CasperPublished: May 17, 2004 at 11:50 am 2 comments

I have seen what may be a perfect movie. Van Helsing should be shown in film schools as an object lesson; both in what not to ever do and in how to cram as many clichés into a two hour span as possible.

There is nothing good to say about this movie. I knew it was going to be bad when I went into the theatre (I was hoping for at least some good CGI and effects), but I had no idea it was going to be Battlefield Earth kind of bad. Really, you almost have to see this to appreciate the true atrociousness of this cinema piece. Don't, but you know what I mean.

I would honestly expect a movie this bad to be a career killer for some of the people involved. Not Beckingsale, as this is the second bad vampire movie in which she has been involved in a row. But this may be the last we see of Jackman for a while (at least until X-Men 3).

If someone asks you to go and see this movie, they are not your friend. Watch time :24.

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  • 1 - richard

    May 17, 2004 at 4:09 pm

    Too bad the writer can't describe anything about the movie except it was bad. Kinda like like your writing, huh?

  • 2 - Natalie Davis

    May 17, 2004 at 9:39 pm

    We won't see Hugh Jackman again until X3? Dream on. As if. He's one of the leading contenders to replace Pierce Brosnan as Bond, he's up for a Tony for "The Boy from Oz" (and is hosting the awards show), and is already signed to star in Darren Aronofsky's The Fountain. As for Beckinsale's "bad vampire movie," work on a sequel to Underworld will be under way soon. Which leads me to believe that the author doesn't know too much about this subject. VH isn't great art, to be sure, but it's a fun popcorn flick and thrill ride -- which is all it was intended to be.

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