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No, this isn't Oprah... it's the final episode of Survivor: Exile Island. Oh yeah — and some guy named Aras won a million dollars, but you might not have noticed if you weren't paying close attention.
Last night, the 12th season of the surprisingly durable Survivor reality TV franchise came grinding to a close during a typically bloated three hour season finale and reunion special.
Overall, Exile Island has been a remarkably self-aware and tedious installment of Survivor, despite the best efforts of the producers to keep the challenges interesting and mess with the rules now and then. Each contestant was more or less strategizing and "playing the game" out in the open from day one, displaying an alarming familiarity with the mechanics of the series rivaled only by those of us loyally watching at home for the past eleven seasons.
This troubling state of affairs was perfectly illustrated in the opening tribal council tie-breaker between Danielle and Cirie. Not only did the "Final Four" specifically plan on a tie vote in advance, "D" and Cirie were even able to practice for the inevitable fire-building tie-breaker challenge. Everyone knew exactly what to expect, fire was made, Danielle prevailed, and we were down to our final three. I sure wish Probst would have surprised them with the old "colored rock in a bag" tie-breaker instead.
The next day, there was a curious "pre-immunity" reward challenge that was actually a close fight to the finish between alpha he-men Aras and Terry — a rare case where the editors didn't have to make it look more exciting than it actually was. Captain "Terry" America won, of course, and was rewarded with some steamed veggies, a protein shake, and a pillow. Gee, thanks.
Soon enough, the traditional walk of remembrance convened on Exile Island. Memories were shared, the music swelled, and the giant wooden skull (and probably everything else on the island) was ceremonially burned to a crisp.
Article comments
1 - El Bicho
"Not only did the "Final Four" specifically plan on a tie vote in advance, "D" and Cirie were even able to practice for the inevitable fire-building tie-breaker challenge."
Not all of them. If he had planned for it, Terry would have made a move and given away his immunity to Danielle like I was begging him to from my couch. He would have assured Danielle's loyalty. The worst that would have happened was fourth instead of third. The odds were against him because no one would have brought him to the finals.
"It wasn't long before Danielle emerged as the unlikely winner,"
because Aras gave up.
"Danielle ultimately wrote "Terri" on the parchment...(Note to Danielle: men generally spell that name "Terry,"...)"
Considering what an arrogant he-man Terry is, the "i" might have been done on purpose as a slight because that is something I could see bothering Terry.
"correctly declaring Terry the only deserving winner,"
The game isn't about being the most athletic, which Terry was. That's only half of it. The game is also about alliances, which he failed miserably at. He came over without numbers and never figured that part of the game out. He selfishly kept his immunity and as his team grew smaller was never able to bridge the gap. Whenever he made the slightest headway, the group countered.
"Oh yeah, and a guy won a million dollars... we didn't talk about that at all."
Probst suggested he pay his taxes from the money he was getting on the morning show. Plus, if Cirie was the most popular online, why not focus on her?
2 - Joan Hunt
Congrats! This article has been placed on Advance.net
3 - Joan Hunt
The one thing I did like about the final three was the fact that they had all been the ones who'd spent the most time on Exile Island.
I was surprised that it all came down to D and Aras. While I could understand Aras as a strong competitor for Terry, Danielle had been hanging by a thread for oh-so-long and really didn't deserve to be there. If Terry had made it to the final two, I think he'd have won. No matter what anyone thought of him, his determination and consistency in playing the game were to be admired.
Ah, well...until they allow viewers to do the voting, we just have to sadly sit by and watch the drama and comedy unfold.
We definitely deserve to see some variety in locale in the future. A back to Africa show would be welcome, as would something out in the middle of Death Valley. No fruit trees or oases there. Lots of snakes. Scorpions. All the good stuff.
4 - Ty
I hated how they allowed viewers to vote someone to win a car. Just like Rupert, undeserving Cirie got a car. I am ticked off because she lasted so f**king long BUT NEVER WENT TO EXILE ISLAND. I am glad she didn't win.
But remember, Danielle told Terry if he had given her the idol, he was in the final 2 no matter what. I said before this Terry made a mistake by not giving her the idol. Looks like it cost him the $1 million.
5 - Ty
BTW, Rupert didn't get a car, he got a million bucks in an online vote. It was pathetic because he is by far one of the worst Survivor players ever. He could be on every season, but he'll never win. He doesn't understand the game of Survivor or simple game theory as applied to Survivor.
6 - Brent
You have to admit that Danielle was smarter than dumbass Aras. When the question is "choose a number between 1 and 1,000,000" answering 4 is particularly stupid (the correct answer would be 500,000). Of course that assumes that the question isn't just an excuse for voting for the lesser of two evils. Terry would have won against either of them.
7 - RogerMDillon
"I hated how they allowed viewers to vote someone to win a car."
It's called advertising. If you don't like it, then you should stop watching TV.
"You have to admit that Danielle was smarter than dumbass Aras."
Aras knew that he wasn't going to get Shane's vote so his answer didn't matter. If Danielle was smart, she would have made a move sooner.
8 - Ty
"It's called advertising. If you don't like it, then you should stop watching TV."
No need the harshness. I just think these two incidents (voting for Rupert to get money and voting for Cirie to get a car) is pathetic. It had NOTHING TO DO with advertising. If it did, there were far better ways to get the advertising done than allow pathetic fans to vote for their pathetic favorite "Survivor."
If you don't like my opinion, then you should stop reading blogcritics.org.
(How do you like them apples???)
9 - Stephen V Funk
I am also opposed to the "popularity contest" runner-up prize, simply because it dilutes the whole point of the Survivor game.
If you know you might win a car or a million bucks by being the "most popular" person on the show, why not just coast along being nice/cute/funny/adorable rather than getting involved with strategy, alliances, etc. It gives contestants a pathetic "alternate route" to winning a big prize on the game.
This isn't American Idol, folks. We, the huddled TV viewing masses should have no say in who wins anything. That's what the "jury" is supposed to be for.