The real game finally begins, as the American Idol Top 12 hit the big stage and tried to convince the country that we care at all about Diana Ross. Early grade: we don’t. I’ve decided to recap the show week-to-week and grade the singers on a sliding scale of how much I wanted to, or did, TiVo-bloop through the song. At the end of each recap I’ll make my pick for who should (and hopefully will) get the axe on the Wednesday night results show.
Let’s break it down, bloop bloop style!
1. Melinda Doolittle – Full on no bloop, put the phone on vibrate, close the iBook, drop the fork performance. I’m right with Simon who felt the song itself was dreadful, but the performance was dynamite. I dig her power, her control, and her look. And I’m only 8% put off by her horse teeth. She’s an effervescent performer, utterly absorbing to watch. This is definitely her competition to lose.
2. Blake Lewis – The smartest performance of the night. Blake knows he has a smaller voice than most of the other singers, so he pushes his strong suit of showmanship and arrangement. The music was kickin', I didn’t care that the vocal was small and quiet, and the moves were right on. I was thinking it would be a locked up one bloop for Blake when I heard it was a Diana Ross night, but he pulled through. I put the TiVmote on the coffee table for this one.
3. Haley Scarnato – One bloop it so you can avoid the singing, but still take an extended opportunity to leer at the hotness of Haley. Girl brought it fly last night. I picked her as one of my horses, and though I don’t think she’ll get by on her voice (it’s thinner than Sanjaya’s flat ironed hair), she is easily the hottest, most camera-friendly contestant. And as Katharine McPhee will attest, kittenish good looks and a suspect voice will take you very far in a resoundingly LA-fivish finalist pool. Put it to you this way, Stephanie, Gina, and Sanjaya the boychick all have better voices than Haley, but push come to shove, who would you rather watch week in and week out? Exactly.