TV Review: Gossip Girl - "Gone with the Will"

Mirror, Mirror, On the Wall, Who's the Most Evil of Them All?

4. The Mini-Blairs: If you ever needed to know why or how Nazi Germany happened, these girls would be a good group to study. With Blair preoccupied full time Chuck-wise these young storm troopers are completely out of control.

Mini-Blair #1: His dad just died.
Mini-Blair #2: Yeah, like a month ago!

As Blair said, “It’s so hard finding obedient minions.”

As if their treachery wasn’t bad enough, we got to see the next generation accost Dan and Vanessa in a candy store. I’m not sure what to call these evil tweens. The super mini-Blairs?

3. Uncle Jack: While we still don’t know what happened between him and Blair on New Year’s Eve, we do know that something was seriously off with the way the elder Bass men were raised. Did they have parents like Hitler and Stalin or is that just what it takes to succeed in business?

Uncle Jack set up poor Chuck in a maneuver so obvious that only Blair and Chuck couldn’t see it coming a hundred miles away. I understand Chuck being fooled, he’s been going through a lot and he has an obvious weakness for cocaine and whores, but Blair was left heartbroken and empty and we have to wonder why her Machiavellian sixth sense never kicked in.

2. Me: When I heard that Lily and Rufus’s love spawn had died in a sailing accident, I was practically jumping up and down screaming with joy. Enough with this silly plot twist. Sadly, I was taken in just as easily as the former rocker and his troubled “it” girl.

1. The adoptive parents: They lied! Love spawn is alive and well. In the real world, we’d never broach this topic again, but my guess is that Gossip Girl's investigative powers will figure out the real truth in less than three episodes.

Article Author: Brad Laidman

Brad Laidman writes on pop, politics, and other less than vital issues. He blogs at Brad Laidman.com and is desperate for comments so that he will feel truly loved.

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