Look, it's an elite weight-loss program! No, it's a resuscitator for a dying career! No, it's Dancing with the Stars! Tonight, a defensive linebacker glided across a dance floor with a Polish (self-proclaimed) seductress spinning around him, a Wild Thing cried and apologized repeatedly when she disappointed her partner, and a computer geek turned billionaire escorted a befringed dominatrix across the hardwood. Such are the paradoxes inherent in this show. We had the usual celebrity types this season, with a few twists and surprises.
But before we get into who danced tonight, let's talk about who didn't. ABC does love to tease a shocker, but I have a feeling the ones they revealed tonight were not welcome. Jewel, who had suffered from tendinitis for the past couple weeks, and was diagnosed with fractured tibia in both legs last week and so had to pull out of the show, and Entertainment Tonight anchor Nancy O'Dell tore her meniscus, an injury that requires surgury and rehab, and so forced her to quit. Now, I was ambivalent about seeing O'Dell perform, but Jewel was a different story. To see that country girl get all gussied up and do something besides croon beautifully would have been a real treat. I won't make you wait like ABC.
Jewel's replacement is Holly Madison, who wants you to know one thing: she is NOT a Playmate! She may be one of The Hef's girlfriends (as shown in her E! reality show The Girls Next Door), but she has also been a photo editor for Playboy and has appeared in Scary Movie 4 and Entourage. These things apparently make her one of the "most popular women in the world today," according to her official bio on ABC's website.
The other replacement quite the shocker, and probably a smart move on ABC's part. Last week's most famous reality show dumpee has become the newest cast member of DWTS. That's right, The Bachelor's Jason Mesnick's loss is DWTS' gain, according to Len Goodman, as former Dallas Cowgirl Melissa Rycroft steps in as Tony Dovolani's partner.
And now, for a bit of play-by-play analysis, with the stars ordered from highest to lowest score.
Article comments