Whenever you see Carmella Soprano listen to Andrea Bocelli’s “Time to Say Goodbye”, you know that one of two things is going to happen. First, there will be a jump cut to the the Ba Da Bing Club and raucous heavy metal background music. Second, someone’s going to get whacked. Of course, almost any activity on the Sopranos tends to be followed by someone getting whacked. David Chase’s show is structurally similar to American Idol that way, only the music tends to be better. On the other hand, if you compare aberrant behavior on the two shows it’s a very close call.
It thus didn’t surprise me at all that they introduced, guest divo-maker, David Foster by saying he was responsible for dozens of hits. The blind sidekick hit-man who looked like Andrea Bocelli and did this sweet-natured schtick with Foster about being able to see hair color and female attractiveness made for really good Sopranos-style drama.
I got especially excited when Foster talked Chris Daughtry into lying down on the floor in front of the piano on the pretext of helping him sing more from his diaphragm. I was sure that Bocelli was then going to smother the alt-rocking family man with a pillow or at least Foster was going to talk Chris into barking like a dog or wearing a tutu then hand him a DVD, toss a glass of orange juice in his face, and scream, “That’s a message from “Live” for stealing their arrangement you derivative *#($*.”
I also was sure that the falsetto note Foster talked Kellie Pickler into further unhinging from the melody of that song from Ghost was supposed to signal the moment when Bocelli would suddenly take her out with a pefectly-placed shot to her calamari. Paula has already suggested to Kellie that her future might be in acting and the roller skating waitress would have been great in a death scene, a la Adrianna, going “What’s a Code Blue? Or "Ah can’t die with no boyfriend!”
It’s easy enough to imagine Kellie Pickler now resurfacing on Joey as a cousin from the even dimmer-witted Southern Sicily branch of the Tribiani family.
"How you doin?...."
"Joey, she's your cousin. Like your third cousin?"
"Okay then... how you doin?"
"Where Ahm from in Sicily, cousins marry all the time."
In a couple years, Kellie could then reappear in the Idol audience amidst the sea of Kevin Nealons, Sela Wards, Tori Spellings, as yet another person who was on television long enough to be recognizable at least with some help from a screen prompt.