The Rock of Love Girls vs. The Flavor of Love Girls: Desperation, Money, and Fame

Well, I’ve been watching Rock of Love with Bret Michaels and I’ve got to say it’s left me cold. At first I wondered what I – an avid reality show watcher who scheduled her everyday life around VH1 Celebreality, food competition shows, and true crime and police procedurals – was doing letting episode after episode of Rock of Love slip by.

At first I wondered if I had gone racist. I mean, it was possible. Maybe enduring all the Rock of Love blondes who thought they owned the world was turning me off. One can take just so much entitlement, after all. I’d hate to think that I was racist however. And it’s not as if I disliked everyone on the show. I liked Rodeo. She was real. She was human. She had substance. And she seemed to actually – as the catch phrase in these love shows goes – “be there for Bret.”

The trouble with the Rock of Love girls is that they lack the desperation and personality of the Flavor of Love girls. If anyone challenges me and says that I just don’t understand white girls, I beg to differ. I understand white girls well enough. Most of my female friends have been white. Long story.

The plain fact is that while both sets of women probably aren’t all that enamored of the fading music icon they pretend to adore, both groups differ in what they want. The Rock of Love girls seem to want fame and all the partying that goes with it. So many stripper poles, so little time. The Flavor of Love girls, on the other hand, had a little more depth... or perhaps desperation. With the Flavor of Love girls, I had to get in touch with my inner gold-digger. Which wasn’t so hard because I live in the 'hood and I understand poverty. I know what it’s like growing up without money and having one’s eyes on men with power and money. And while I married for love instead of money, I can totally understand why those women – black or white – would see the Flavor as a possible sugar daddy with fame benefits. It’s no secret that the two women (Delishis and Hoops) who have “won” Flav’s love in two different seasons simply went on to bigger better things after using Flav as a stepping stone. Most of those girls were poor and in need and the show was their way of getting money - and fame - even in some small fading hip-hop hipster kind of way.

The trouble with the Rock of Love girls, however, and the reason I can’t quite click with them is that they seem to be attracted more to the excitement of a partying lifestyle and to fame than they are to money.

Call me cynical, but love, with the rare exception of Rob and Amber and the cowboy in the second offering of Joe Millionaire, is rarely part of the package. Many of the women who go compete in these shows compete because they want fame, excitement or money.

Now, why should money matter to me in this particular case? After all, I watch other reality shows where competitors cook, argue, scheme, and live with each other ... all for one goal: money.

I got an insight on this suddenly when I heard Nickleback’s latest hit, “Rockstar.” For those who haven’t heard this country-styled rocking song, I’ll just say that the song pretty much cynically defines rock star fame by its monetary and sexual benefits. It’s an honest song. There is none of the cliched “rock is about freeing the soul and pushing societal and emotional boundaries” stuff one hears when rock stars tout their craft. We get the basics: it’s about sex, power, money, and being away from regular life.

Article Author: Carole McDonnell

Carole McDonnell's short stories and essays appear online and in print, in speculative fiction, ethnic, and Christian publications. She lives in New York with her husband, two sons, and their pets. Wind Follower, published by Juno Books in June 2007, …

Visit Carole McDonnell's author page — Carole McDonnell's Blog