The Killers of Hell's Kitchen

Part of: TV Raves And Rants

What in the name of all that is good and holy are those women on Hell's Kitchen thinking?

No, seriously, it's time for a good old fashioned rant...

Last night, three of the women — yes, three of them — tried to serve food that may actually have made people ill had it gotten out of the kitchen. It was almost enough to make me worry about going out to eat. So many of the people on the show are actual chefs at restaurants. Are the people that cook in restaurants really more concerned about getting food out fast than not making their customers ill?

First on the list last night you have Joanna, who wanted to serve rancid crab. She claims never to have smelled the crab so, the claim goes, she didn't know that it was bad. She did however, as the cameras pointed out, taste it, so she should have had some idea. Good old Gordon Ramsay, however, was on his game — he smelled it and tore Joanna, deservedly, a new one.

Next up, Bonnie. It was Bonnie's job to cook the scallops. Upon being called to the pass by Ramsay, Bonnie, in her inimitably blond fashion, queried Ramsay about what was wrong, quickly following the first question with one about whether the scallops were raw. Now, a smarter person who was trying to pass off raw fish as being cooked wouldn't immediately jump to "is the fish raw" — they'd allow the person judging them to state the problem up front. The issue could have been any number of things, and she, by jumping the gun, made it clear she knew exactly what she did. Dumb. Just dumb.

Lastly, there was Jen. Jen, thinking that they were done with the spaghetti for the night, tossed it. Sadly, they weren't. She was made aware of her error and then went to the garbage to get the spaghetti back. Her claim? Well, it was on the top of the garbage and I only took some of it. Now, a couple of things immediately spring to mind. Additionally, she argued, she was going to cook it again, which would have killed any and all germs. First, as George Costanza learned: adjacent to refuse is refuse. Then, and this only struck me later, but that better have been a different garbage can than the one that the rancid crab ended up in. I believe it was, but wouldn't swear to it.

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Article Author: Josh Lasser

Josh Lasser, formerly known as "TV and Film Guy," and complete with a Masters Degree in Critical Studies in said areas, gives his opinions on TV, Film, and Entertainment in general. All of which he does in a shameless attempt to try to get paid to do the exact same thing. …

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  • 1 - Dick Masterson

    Jun 19, 2007 at 2:54 pm

    Women don't even belong in the kitchen.

    What a disgrace.

    -Dick

  • 2 - TV and Film Guy

    Jun 19, 2007 at 2:55 pm

    That was not quite my point.

  • 3 - Phillip Winn

    Jun 19, 2007 at 3:40 pm

    I keep hearing that's exactly where women do belong. This Gordon Ramsay fellow, however, apparently his kitchen sucked big-time. :-)

  • 4 - El Bicho

    Jun 19, 2007 at 3:51 pm

    I think Jen would have left as well if that guy who got taken to the hospital hadn't been forced to leave, but they couldn't lose two weeks of shows.

    This was the most I've seen of an episode this season. I can't speak for what's in Melissa's heart or mind, but it wasn't completely unreasonable for her to push for Julia. Creme Brulee is a very basic dessert for nicer restaurants. Also, Julia does seem to be good in the kitchen, so why not take a stab at getting rid of competition and keeping Jen who won't be a threat. It betters the odds to advance. It is a game show after all. Right now, my money is on Rock to win the whole thing.

    btw, everyone who has ever been on Top Chef runs rings around these people. The producers seem to purposefully pick misfits on Hell's Kitchen.

  • 5 - TV and Film Guy

    Jun 19, 2007 at 4:57 pm

    El Bicho, I'm sure you're right, but Hell's Kitchen claims, or at least used to, that it was a show anyone could enter, not just chefs. It's a different concept completely.

  • 6 - El Bicho

    Jun 19, 2007 at 5:59 pm

    Not really, the website states that the winner gets to be "Head Chef of a new fine Italian restaurant at the Green Valley Ranch Resort and Spa in Las Vegas." So while they may let anyone in for the TV show, surely they aren't going to let anyone win. Do you honestly think any of the participants could do that? While I pick Rock to win out of this group, I am not convinced that he could run a kitchen.

  • 7 - TV and Film Guy

    Jun 19, 2007 at 6:11 pm

    The prize for the contest does not define the contest. Hell's Kitchen, is, purportedly, about finding the best, whatever their profession, and that allows them to have "average" people and not just chefs.

  • 8 - El Bicho

    Jun 19, 2007 at 7:03 pm

    Right. I'd like to hear that coming from the owner of the Green Valley Ranch Resort and Spa.

  • 9 - TV and Film Guy

    Jun 19, 2007 at 8:12 pm

    Actually, I'm sure what Green Valley Ranch wants to publicize is "The Winner of Hell's Kitchen," and I'm further sure that Goron Ramsay oversees the entire shebang.

  • 10 - Brent

    Jun 20, 2007 at 4:52 pm

    Getting rid of Julia (or trying to) had nothing to do with her being black; it had everything to do with snobbery. Julia works at The Waffle House and therefore is unworthy of being in the presence of a personal chef/nanny like Bonny (which begs the question of who she is personal chef to - the kids that she is a nanny for?).

    While it is true that everyone who has been on "Top Chef" may be able to run circles around the people on "Hell's Kitchen" (and there were a couple on the second season at least that we could argue about) the people on "Top Chef" aren't line cooks or sous chefs as on "Hell's Kitchen" and more to the point they aren't under the pressure to do a complete meal service each episode. The show has less to do with who is the best chef (since the meals seems to stay the same each episode) than it does with who can run a brigade of cooks - in other words leadership and control - under pressure. First of course you have to get rid of the people who make stupid mistakes under pressure.

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