Even on the third viewing of Phantom Menace in the cinema, I still felt high as a meth-soaked tramp when that fucking blue writing came up. Even though I knew all sortsa horrors were about to unfold, it was worth it, it was worth all the gungans in the universe just to see that shit up there.
The time I went in a couple minutes late, so Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon were already killing a gaggle of lizard-folks, I turned and walked the fuck out. It'd be like expecting to get a smack-rush even though you forgot to stick the needle in your vein.
But in the here and now ain't no thoughts of Phantom Menace for to be plaguing a man. Here and now we've moved on, moved on a couple episodes, in fact, and so this prequel trilogy born so humbly, like Christ in his manger, except the manager was a horrible, dull, fancy-pants sci-fi flick, now reaches a glorious conclusion, like Christ again, granted resonance and meaning and instilling hope and wellbeing in a man's soul even though to do so it needs to get involved in all sortsa horrific violence.
I took a minute for to look around me, see what sortsa folks the world had coughed in these doors, anyhow. For sure, I had a glance or two earlier, but, truth be told, I was more interested in the conversation going on behind me. Turned out a few folks, including the attractive female from back in Episode IV, had booked a row of seats, only to find that one of the seats wasn't actually really a seat at all, more a bizarre metallic stump, and so all sortsa kafuffles went on with the management, all sortsa talk of "House seats" and "sorry" and "fuck your fucking stump-seat".
The rest of the audience turned out, for the most part, to be either young children and their parents / guardians, or gangs of youth-types. I couldn't see many other folks sat on their own thinking about hands they'd like to be holding throughout this fucking incredible battle with General Grievous.
Maybe in my head I imagined who I would like to be sat here, and I whispered to her now and again, maybe saying about "Y'know, this dialogue makes me wanna pierce my ear-drums with forks" or "Still, this is much, much better than I thought it was gonna be" or "Is it ok if I put my arm around you for a second? Just this is all rather grim, this bit right here, and I feel a bit sad, and I'd dig it if maybe you were a bit closer".
Article comments
1 - Bennett
Stunned silence, like at the end of a great Cyrano.
"Skinny arsehole I see. Bumping around, it is. Not long it took."
:-]
Thanks, for all of it, Duke.
2 - Aaron, Duke De Mondo
heh, thanks Bennet. god, this is very long-winded.
3 - Bennett
Yeah, you really let the fingers fly, hell, they damn near migrated south!
Did you catch my post on Simple Tasteful Nudes? I ask because, even in your abruptly single state of mind, a bit more torture won't kill you.
A gal they had up three days ago damn near broke my heart, so pretty she was.
Enjoy!
4 - Eric Olsen
Duker, a novel in "review" form, a walk through our very civilization at the near-beginning of the 21st century; a series of guffaws, chortles, belly-laughs, and snickers, interspersed a with slight welling of moisture in empathy with the profound sadness and death-grief without the satisfaction of death to support it.
I swear to God you will get over this woman, and she never appreciated you anyway.
I think I WILL go see the flick this weekend.
5 - Aaron, Duke De Mondo
EO, thank you. I'm glad you dug it. I was a bit unsure about posting it to be honest, it is really very long-winded and self-absorbed.
And you MUST go see it this weekend. Society would stand for nothing less, i'd wager.
And Bennett, i can scarsely thank you enough for alerting me to said post. Excellently written, it was, too. And obviously welcome in these trying times...
6 - Mark Saleski
i will balance out society by not seeing this movie this weekend.
or ever.
oh, and duke, we count on you to be long-winded and self-absorbed.
7 - Mat
My lord, Duke, the length. The Length!
I've had sex in less time than it took me to read that.
I've read Tolstoy in less time.
Ok, so there were a good number of chuckles, a lot of big smiles, and a couple of hearty guffaws too.
Truth be known I just skimmed the cliff notes on Tolstoy. And I've had sex in less time than it takes to read a haiku.
8 - Eric Berlin
Duke, I've been holding off on reading this sure masterpiece as I've not yet seen the latest S Wars. I actually sat through the entirety of Attack of the Clones on network TV, no less, in prep... but it looks like it will be at least several days.
Anyway, just glancing through the comments makes me want to see the damned thing so I can get to the main course right here at the old BC stomping grounds...
9 - Temple Stark
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