Region 1 DVD Releases for 19th July 2005

Two words. Joss Whedon. It'll all make sense soon enough.

Constantine

By the time I got around to seeing this, it was only showing in a sketchy theater in downtown Philly, so I wimped out. I've heard good and bad things. The worst is that it's a total betrayal of the original Hellblazer comic that took place in London, not L.A., with a blonde British protagonist, not Ted. The most positive thing I've heard is that this is on par with a really good episode of Angel, so I'm in. That, and how can you beat Peter Stormare as Satan, really?

The producers of the two-disc special edition aren't afraid of comparisons with the source material. It comes with an original Hellblazer comic as well as a Hellblazer short story.

Ice Princess

On the other end of the spectrum, we have The Girl Who Ruined Buffy on ice skates. Probably just the ticket for female tweeners, and absolutely no one else. Will also get them used to seeing Kim Catrall before they grow up and become addicted to Sex and the City. Commentary by the actors probably does not include Michelle Trachtenburg explaining why the Buffy scribes introduced her in the fifth season and then proceeded to stop working. But I'm not bitter.

Man of the House

As if we needed more evidence that Revolution Studios was pure, unadulterated evil (Christmas with the Cranks, Little Black Book, White Chicks - and that was just 2004), we have this lame attempt at a Tommy Lee Jones vehicle. "Hey, you know what would be funny? Tommy Lee Jones wrangling a bunch of cheerleaders!" Or so the pitch must have gone. The response to which should have been, "Hey, you know what would be really funny? Tommy Lee Jones punching you in the nuts!" But alas, they made this instead. Revolution Studios tally for '05 so far? Are We There Yet?, XXX: State of the Union, and this.

The Crow: Wicked Prayer

Betcha didn't know they were still making sequels to this. But the series, like its protagonist, refuses to just die. Somehow, at the straight-to-DVD level, the franchise is able to score a bigger-name (or at least equal) cast as the original. David "speaking-of-Angel" Boreanaz is the heavy, and Edward Furlong is our undead hero. Perhaps at the climax they argue about who's career is in greater decline. Tara Reid shows up, presumably sober, but my money's on not. And Dennis Hopper plays El Nino. You might think that's the name of a character, but I honestly hope he actually portrays the destructive weather phenomenon.

Article Author: David Dylan Thomas

David Dylan Thomas is a Philly-based writer/filmmaker who opines voraciously about dem pictures what move on the screen at DavidDylanThomas.com.

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