Paris Hilton Porn To Be Released In iMax Theaters

"I'm ready for my eight-story tall close up."

Written by Joe Wilson

LOS ANGELES, Calif. (PoopyCaca.com) – Based on the box office success of "House of Wax," which includes the thespian prowess of Ms. Paris Hilton, iMax theaters announced they will bring Hilton’s previous work on the small screen to the obnoxiously large screen.

After the recent fall out from Nicole Richie admitting she hacked Paris Hilton’s phone and Ms. Hilton stating she was annoyed that news organizations were not asking her to weigh in on important issues, some said that the hotel heiress, who suffers from F.E.D.D. (facial expression deficit disorder) may have jumped the shark.

The homemade porn featuring Paris Hilton and her kinky costar Rick Salomon, will be digitally remastered for the iMax format. An extended DVD version was distributed in stores via Red Light District Video, but fans of Ms. Hilton’s performance will now have the opportunity to see it on a screen eight stories high with digital surround sound.

The announcement that iMax theaters will be the first to bring NC-17 rated content to the very, very, very large screen is seen by many as a surprising reversal after some iMax theaters decided to ban a film that references the "ridiculous theory known as evolution."

iMax Theater spokesperson, Stephanie Green, said, "The theaters that banned "Volcanoes of the Deep Sea," which makes a connection between human DNA and microbes inside undersea volcanoes, said that as long as evolution is not referenced in Paris Hilton’s film, it would not be a problem."

Article Author: PoopyCaca

Joe Wilson is a comedian, writer, actor and private investigator based in Los Angeles.

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