I am sure you are wondering why I saw it. I am not sure I can answer. It was something I felt compelled to see. Perhaps I wanted to take the bullet for the rest of you. Well, that can't be right — if that were true I would have seen it opening weekend. In any case, I have seen it and I can confirm that it is an extraordinarily dull affair during which little happens and people insist on doing the opposite of what logic would appear to dictate.
The film opens with our resident killer, played by Dylan Walsh. It is Christmas time and we watch as he cuts off his beard, dyes his hair, and puts in colored contacts. He calmly walks downstairs and makes some toast before picking up a couple of bags and leaving. During his exit, we see the bodies of a woman and children around the house. It is pretty clear what happened here.
We jump ahead to find our killer, formerly known as Grady Edwards, using the name David Harris and flirting with recent divorcee Susan Harding (Sela Ward). All seems fine and dandy until son Michael (Penn Badgely) returns from military school. He senses something is not right. Soon enough there are enough pieces in place for an explosive finale where "David's" murderous tendencies are revealed.
This is a movie I would like to just push completely from my memory. Yes, I have seen worse movies so you will not hear me say this is the worst ever made. I think it commits an even bigger sin than a good number of so-called bad movies — it's boring. The film looks boring, all of the characters (save for Dylan Walsh) have zero personality, the story is not interesting, and it offers up nothing new.
The Stepfather does offer a number of lessons. Take the title, for example. The character is not even close to actually being a stepfather — the characters aren't married. You also do not need any identification to acquire a marriage license or to work in real estate. I also learned it is all right to keep locked cabinets with unknown contents in the home of a woman you have only known for six months. Another good lesson is if you suspect someone may be a murderer and you have evidence, be sure to not call the police.
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