With Regards The Setting Of Scenes Prior To The Reviewing Of Screaming Masterpiece
Says a friend of mine to the local pharmacist of an evening a couple years back; "Tell me this, now… Can you perchance supply to me this fine noontide a toxin might feasibly instill within these cells, bones, nerve-endings and such, a sensation akin to that which Mother Mary must've felt when her belly got to swelling with the vapors of The Lord?"
The fellow chewed the lips a time, clucked the tongue, and then; "I have exactly the article for that."
From inside the old suit-jacket he had on, itself emblazoned with any number of Sufjan Stevens pins and Daniel Johnston badges, he produced a compact disc upon which was scrawled, in blue marker, the words Sigur Rós - Reykjavik 2001.
"What's this" asks the punter. "OxyContin?"
"None o' that" quoth the merchant, "None of that at all. What it is, is the music of the glaciers, the sound of the Northern Lights glistening on the waters of Lake Langisjór, the symphonies of the Njarðvík night, the..."
"This is Icelandic music you're givin' me?" the lad interrupts, jerking the head back a touch, cocking an eyebrow. "The felchin' Christ do I want with this?"
"What don't you want with it?" rebuts the merchant. "Iceland, boyo. It's where it's at."
"Since when?"
"Since… like, fuckin', ever. The vocals like they're comin' at you from across the river of Hades, the samples, the beats, the…"
"Beats?" the punter scoffs. "I care less for them than a willy-john cares for the sheen o' the Marble Arch. Samples? I couldn't give a fisted arse I never hear another in all my days."
"Suit yourself, son" the seller shrugs, turning away. "But I tell you this; I put that on for no more than ten minutes and I swear on Noah's ankles it was a month afore I could see again."
The lad bites his bottom lip, his eyes all twitching with contemplation. "Alright" he says eventually. "Alright then, give me the damn disc, and let me see if it's all that, right enough."
He took the disc.
No one saw or heard tell of him until early last December, when he showed up on the banks of the River Bann, bruised of body and famished of stomach and bollock-naked save for a length of sea-otter hide he'd wrapped about his skull like a turban.
Article comments
1 - Jon Sobel
Cool, I am going to look out for this DVD that you so righteously describe. Also this might be the most awesome review of yours that my eye-holes have yet beheld. All of the legendary Duker stylations plus extreme focus.
2 - Duke De Mondo
jon, i thank you no end, and my god, just last night i was lamenting to my ladyfriend, beautiful ms gillian, that i had just submitted a review to blogcritics that may be the most nonsensical, ill-considered, pointless mess i've ever scribbled, and that i may well have some apologising to do to all concerned once the folks who sent the material get to reading it. i don't say that for to have all "oh, not at all, it rocks" etc but for to illustrate the relief i felt there now; "extreme focus"!
i really am very very suprised at that, and pleased, also. maybe i couldn't make sense of it when reading it back because i've got the flu...
either way, thank you very much, and yes, keep an eye out for the flick, it's well worth a gander, is my opinion on the matter.
3 - Duke De Mondo
jon, i just left a lengthy comment thanking you for the "extreme focus" remark, owing to how i was shittin it that this made no sense. sadly, the comment was lost to the ones and the zeroes for some reason. but thank you, was all i said really, and also, yes, keep an eye out for the flick. some astounding stuff in there.
4 - Duke De Mondo
jon, i tried a few times to say thank you, and my comments keep dissapearing, so third time lucky, thank you very much, particulary for the "extreme focus" remark, since i was wailin to my ladyfriend just last night that this was nonsense that lacked anythin approachin focus. so nice to know it made sense to you. maybe it's cause i'm used to havin NO focus, so havin some seems weird to read back. i dunno. anyhow, thank you!
5 - Aaron Fleming
Superb Duke, as always, focused AND poetic!
6 - gillian
great review, and you were stewin a bit over this. there was no need to worry; another excellent article :) xo