Written by Fantasma el Rey
I haven’t seen Friday The 13th Part VIII: Jason Takes Manhattan in years and there is a reason. As a kid I used to fear these movies and their monster maniac killers but seen as a full-grown adult these things bring mostly laughs. Today the true horror they bring is in the fact that I spend so much time still watching them.
The plot goes thusly: a high-school senior class of late 1980s, cool kids hop on a ship christened, of all things, Lazarus and head for the glory that is New York City. Trouble starts soon as the unsuspecting ship picks up the recently resurrected from the grave Jason Voorhees, who resumes his eradication of stupid/naughty/horny teenagers and those who accompany them as they chance to pass the site of his childhood death. While on board he wastes no time in getting down to business and the hacking and slashing take on many new/fun forms.
Our two latest “good” kids are Rennie and her boyfriend Sean, a neat and clean couple who are pure of heart, which is always the key to success; I mean really, how else can they defeat an insane, superhuman killer, right? Oops, gave away the ending there. The hell with it, let’s continue. After picking off the majority of young hipsters aboard ship, the remainders decide to fight back and take the killing to the killer. Well, the kiddies get an “A” for effort but they fail for the fact that on board they can only manage to flee the now-burning ship with an angered Jason left behind and their numbers further dwindled down. Bad move, never piss off the dead ugly kid. As the last Lazarus survivors row their dingy on open water little do they know that big J has jumped in the water behind them.
After a good all-night row the beautiful Statue of Liberty is spotted and safety is presumably reached but it wouldn’t be Jason Takes Manhattan if they all lived happily ever after. Now the funny starts as we get to watch Jason run amuck on the vicious streets of the big city, killing some folks along the way who try to interfere with his sea-born hunt. Jason stalks the port docks, subway cars and tunnels, city streets, back alleys, and finally the toxic waste-soaked sewer of the city tracking down the remaining ship-goers.
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