Tim Alexander's Diary of a Tired Black Man is supposed to be the black male version of Waiting to Exhale. In the film, a straightforward narrative is coupled with documentary footage of actual conversations exploring the issues that exist in black heterosexual relationships. This film didn't deserve the initial buzz it received and it certainly doesn't deserve the hype it's getting now.
The biggest problem with Diary of a Tired Black Man is that no one bothered to write a decent story or well-rounded characters for the fictional portion of the film. James (Jimmy Jean-Louis) is a black man struggling to find a good relationship with a black woman. This drama isn't anything new; it's a horse beaten to the point where I'm surprised it can stand up.
The narrative segments follow the plot of an average romantic comedy and feel lifeless and automatic. The characters have no soul. The actors exist solely to perform ideological archetypes designed to make you believe that a problem exists where there isn't one.
One of the "issues" you're supposed to care about is the supposed tendency of black women to wild out on a man for reasons not typically worth getting upset about. In one scene James leaves his underwear in the bathroom which his then-wife Tonya (Paula Lema) sees. She proceeds to go off on James. This seems to me like the logical result of piggish behavior. If you're going to live with someone else, you should assume that the person you're with is going to have a problem with crap on the floor. Most women — like most people — would like to have a clean place to live and sleep in. If James was tired of this or couldn't find a woman who would be more relaxed about it, he should just be alone. Bachelorhood is about the only time you're allowed to do exactly what you want without another voice in the room.
There's another scene in which Tonya sees James — now divorced — bring a new girl along when he comes to pick up their daughter. In addition to being mad at James for being weak, she's now mad at him for being with a white woman. White women, according to ignorant stereotypes, are weaker than black women. But James comes off more as an idiot than a weakling. Why would you take another woman — white or otherwise — to the house of your ex-wife whose idea of a good time was spitting in your face? There's no way I would introduce a girl to someone like that if I could help it.
Article comments
1 - so-called uncle tom / sellout
notice how if tis guy was a white guy or a thug. this women won't dare do that
2 - Coby
Mr. Milam,
You missed the whole point of this film. You shouldn't have even watched it. You apparently aren't tired of you're black woman.
3 - jj
The main female character was angry for no clear reason other than using anger to control her man. Most couples who face this problem know why the woman is angry. The movie is very incomplete.
4 - roger nowosielski
"Nobody cares one iota about getting a woman or a man these days. People are only concerned with survival."
I hate to disagree, friend. Human relations come before politics. At least they ought to.