Movie Lessons For The New Year

Now that it's 2007 and all, I hope that the film industry will take a moment to reflect on what they've learned from the past year, to consider the mistakes they've made and hopefully not repeat them this year.

Just in case you studios, producers, directors, and actors are listening, here are those lessons, in no particular order.

Enough with the exploitation... er, adaptation of Japanese horror movies for Western audiences. Yes, The Ring did well at the box office and helped Naomi Watts come out of Nicole Kidman's shadow (somewhat). Yes, it's great to expand our notions of horror by looking at how the Japanese conceptualize it. However, enough is enough. With both The Ring 2 and The Grudge 2 failing at the box office, perhaps they should move on. Hey, I hear that Korean horror movies are increasing in popularity. Or — here's a wild idea — and maybe it's just me talking, but come up with something completely original!

Video game movies are bad, mmmkay? Just because a video game was fun to play and sold lots of copies doesn't mean that people will want to watch it in theaters. Bloodrayne had a $25 million budget, but only had a total US gross of $2 million. Silent Hill had a $50 million budget but only a US gross of $46 million, although worldwide gross is admittedly better. The thing is that stories in most video games aren't substantial enough to fill a whole movie because they aren't meant to be substantial. It's a video game! You go in, kill stuff, and rescue someone! Could you imagine if 14 years ago someone decided to make a movie about Super Mario Broth... oops, never mind.

Sadly, this warning comes too late, for I hear that video game movie director Uwe Boll is directing a Bloodrayne sequel, which takes place this time in the Wild West — and something about Billy the Kid being a vampire! Ye gads!

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Article Author: Toni Schwartz

Toni is proud to be a gamer chick and a movie buff!

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Article comments

  • 1 - steandric

    Jan 06, 2007 at 8:27 am

    nonsense! naomi watts and nicole kidman are childhood friends long before hollywood. they knew and got along with each other since teenage. naomi had never been in nicole's shadow. you snobbish people made it up in order to up-play the stardom of nicole kidman. of course nicole was luckier than her pal because she met tom cruise. and naomi had had to wait until david lynch cast her in mulholland drive. the ring was a follow-up which further confirmed that she was not just a good actress but was also bankable.

  • 2 - Kaonashi

    Jan 06, 2007 at 4:36 pm

    Steandric- We "snobbish people" did not make anything up. Yes, I know that Nicole and Naomi are old friends. It's hard not to compare the two because of this, and since they're both Australian actresses.

    Yes, Nicole became more well-known because she was married to Tom, but she started becoming really big only after she divorced him. As for Naomi, she's a fine actress, but she's still relatively new and doesn't have Nicole's star power. But it seems that Naomi is doing well, with films like The Painted Veil.

  • 3 - El Bicho

    Jan 06, 2007 at 8:24 pm

    I agree about The Simpsons pathetic state, but it's not because the writers have run out of ideas. It's because the writers aren't in the same league as their previous counterparts.

    While I also agree that a movie from a game isn't a good idea, focusing on theatrical receipts is the wrong way to look at it. Most of a movie's money is now made in DVD sales.

  • 4 - Kaonashi

    Jan 07, 2007 at 2:19 am

    El Bicho- You definitely have a point about The Simpsons. Many of the original, brilliant writers had left, and their replacements just aren't as good.

    You also have a point about basing a movie's success solely on box office numbers. At the same time however, I still think that most movies based on video games range from somewhat tolerable to downright horrid.

  • 5 - Eric Berlin

    Jan 07, 2007 at 2:23 am

    Great lessons Kaonashi, can't disagree with a single one!

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