Did you try to present your first indie film Good Dick to Hollywood? Or, did you already know that you were going the indie route for your film?
Indie route.
Were you surprised at the success of your film?
Absolutely. It continues to pleasantly surprise me.
If you could have changed anything about Good Dick, what would it have been?
Nothing. I am so proud of it. I made that when I was 25! Even if I hadn't made it till I was 40, I'd still be superbly proud out it. The audacity of it confounds me sometimes; its boldness makes me smile. I was so brave then to have made such a film. And because I was so brave then, I have to be brave now too. It's like I made a gift for myself, I set a standard for myself, which I've met in my work since. I've been continuing to meet it, which is astonishing and a bit scary.
Are you still promoting the film?
Yes.
What were the challenges associated with being in front, and behind, the camera?
I found none.
What has been your hardest struggle to overcome as a filmmaker?
I don't have independent memories of any struggle. I think I've blocked them out. I see the continuous, singular, deepest struggle; sometimes I refer to it as "Fighting The Good Fight," as part of the process. The process of the work I am making in my life is a long one.
The very fact that alchemy is occurring means that there's great internal listening going on in a writer or a director or an actor. Watch them when they are working; they are listening so profoundly, it is beautiful. They are so scared and they are still open. They are aware of their fear and they assassinate it by shining light on it and going straight through it. And shadows, perhaps theirs, perhaps not theirs, come through them and they turn into light.
I have to ask the question, without this solo struggle that is the journey of every piece of work, what the hell would we make? There'd be nothing to make. It's not really a struggle, as much as it is a glory train. I regard it with a great deal of respect. For me, I don't have independent memories of what has been over come so far, but I will tell you that a great deal has.
A large battle is won every time we see something made, and out in the light of day, every time an artist shows up to work, a great battle has been won. I don't collect my blows, I don't cherish them, I don't bring them out every once in a while to polish them, I'm not nostalgic for them, I don't pick on myself, I don't remember where my battle scars are, I've pretty much forgotten them. I'm on to the next. I never complain. I would never really even say this out loud, but writing it seems appropriate. I can say that it has been a hell of a ride so far. And I know that the ride only intensifies the further up the road I go. So it's good for me to have amnesia. I need to be fresh for what is ahead.
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