You’d think that a caper comedy with three powerful leads such as Christopher Walken, Morgan Freeman, and William H. Macy would make for some good times. Alas, The Maiden Heist presents itself as a comedy that you know is supposed to be funny, but the laughs that emerged on my end came across as forced.
The plot here centers on Roger Barlow (Walken), a security guard at an art gallery on the verge of retirement. Roger has a crippling obsession over one of the paintings in the gallery, which he focuses all of his spare time on it. But he is not alone: another guard in the gallery (Freeman) has an unhealthy infatuation with a different piece of art, while yet a third guard (Macy) has the most insalubrious fascination over a sculpture on his nighttime rounds. When news gets out that the guards’ three favorite pieces (among many others) are due to ship all the way over to Denmark, Roger and his newfound friends decide to band together in order to save their beloved items: by stealing them. Marcia Gay Harden co-stars as Walken’s long-suffering, attention-starved wife.
Long story short: The Maiden Heist has a few amusing moments in it, but it seems to have some difficulty building up any steam. Walken (the main character, although co-producer Morgan Freeman gives himself top billing here) goes from campy to confined throughout the entire runtime of the film, while Freeman and Macy ham it up to no end. But the biggest faults in The Maiden Heist can probably be attributed to a weak script by writer Michael LeSieur (You, Me And Dupree) and some poor planning by director Peter Hewitt (who should probably stick to making B-Grade kiddie fare like Garfield and Thunderpants).