Do you believe in omens? When I tried to open the case in which Pauly Shore’s movie Adopted was packaged, it was very resistant. Very. Then I looked up Adopted on IMDb to see who else appears in it, and all I got was a blank page. So I went to the film's web site—more blank pages!
When I finally got the DVD into my player, I was delighted (honestly!) to find that Adopted is preceded by trailers for cheesy comedies and thrillers. Sometimes you can’t beat cheesy; you can’t stay in a bad mood when watching cheesy films, and you can’t think about suicide (unless you’re the director or in the cast). As much as I like a good, high quality film, I like crappy, low quality garbage. It’s sort of like craving salty, then craving sweet.
As everyone knows, Pauly Shore is an idiot. He’s been an idiot for as long as he’s been in show business. He may have been an idiot before he ever got on a stage—I wouldn’t know. The thing is, he is so awfully good at being an idiot. Even though he’s gotten a little long in the tooth for innocence, he somehow projects it. Many of the things he says (in character) are sexist and racist, but coming from a hedonistic boob, they seem plainly ignorant, as if he just doesn’t know any better. Maybe “innocence” isn’t the right word; how about stupidity?
Adopted is a mockumentary directed by and starring Pauly Shore. It is the faux chronicle of Pauly’ s attempt to follow in the footsteps of Angelina Jolie and Madonna by adopting an African child. Naturally, he goes about it in all the wrong ways. He stops people in the street and asks if he can buy their children; he visits a healer and throws bones so she can tell him if he will find a child. He even visited the Oprah Winfrey Leadership Academy to see if he could get one of its students.
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Article comments
1 - Lynn Voedisch
Good God, I read this purely out of curiosity, for I simply cannot stand Pauly Shore. He's a scourge on the Earth. How he ever got into show business is a story of nepotism and probably lots of money trading hands. Talent had nothing to do with it.
The fact that you like this fool is most amazing. What is appealing about him? You said he's an idiot. Well...
But, hey it's your review and you get the say in yea or nay.
I'm staying far away from it. Better you than me, Bob.