Well folks, I'm gonna be shamefully outta pocket this week, is what. For sure, there's a couple of these picks that'll be available in the United UK also, but there's a couple others that, for lack of availability, or maybe just because they're illegal, I'm gonna have to paying me some hefty import charges for.
Plus, I just bought a tennis ball signed by Kirsten Dunst on the set of Wimbledon. I figure I might get it stitched into my palm.
Where does it end, man?
Dig these here picks, would you ever.
Metallica - Some Kind Of Monster
Imagine my dismay when I trundled down to the DVD emporium on Monday morning for to get my hands on this masterpiece (one of The Duke's Best Of 2004), when next thing I know the release date's been put back a week. You American types, though, no such worries for you.
What you get is a buncha commentaries and retrospective interviews and so on, but better yet, hours upon hours of full deleted scenes, and extended scenes that you actually wanna watch. Like the entire Dave Mustaine / Lars Ulrich chinwag, for example. The first essential DVD of 2005.
The Guinea Pig Box Set
Now this is where the illegality comes in. These here have never been released in the UK, and although they've been available on Region 1 for some time, this box-set is looking mighty fine to The Duke's eyes.
Be warned, man, this is seriously fucked-up stuff. The first two, The Devil's Experiment and Flower Of Flesh And Blood are pseudo-snuff movies, so convincing that poor old Charlie Sheen contacted the FBI after seeing the second one.
Mermaid In A Manhole is a masterpiece, a flick unlike any other I've ever laid eyes on. This is extreme horror, virtually unwatchable for a vast majority of the running time, and essential, if you can stomach it.
Toxic Crusaders
This just makes me wanna cry, is what. I ain't seen a frame since I was a kid, barring the credits sequence available on the Toxic Avenger DVD, and I'm beside myself with anticipation.
How the hell the idea of a kids cartoon series based on the notoriously sleazy and utterly demented Toxic Avenger flicks ever got the greenlight I'll never know, but thank God it did, is all I can say.
The Story Of The Weeping Camel
This Mongolian flick has yet to cross my eyes, but it's on the Must See list. So convincing that various message boards and web-sites have it listed as a documentary, this is a simple tale of a musician trying to get a mother camel to bond with her offspring. A far cry from those Mermaids In The Manhole from a couple picks back.
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Article comments
1 - Eric Olsen
fascinating and revealing as always. Please, Dukerify me on the meaning of,
"Mermaid In A Manhole is a masterpiece, a flick unlike any other I've ever laid eyes on. This is extreme horror, virtually unwatchable for a vast majority of the running time, and essential, if you can stomach it."
How could such contradictions be true?
2 - Aaron, Duke De Mondo
Eric, basically the point is Mermaid is an absoloutely fantastic, unique piece of work. But it's also incredibly graphic and some folks just won't be willing to sit through it, which is perfectly valid. Thing is, it's one of those flicks, very rare in pop culture even though we're told of a supposed new one every couple weeks, that genuinely has the ability to disturb a motherfucker senseless, if approached in the wrong frame of mind. It deals with a horrific disease, boils and so on, and really is the most extremely unpleasant depiction of such i've ever seen. Thing is, it's more than that, and there's an artistry going on there that elevates it to the masterpiece status i flung in its direction. But one's appreciation of that will depend upon ones willingness to endure the grotesqueries it offers. There's something exhilirating about coming out the other side after forty minutes worth of a mermaid puking pus and worms over the edge of a bathtub. There's a genuine beauty amidst all the horrible squishing and such, and a genuinely sinister air, too. I don't wanna go ahead and yack about Buy this, it's essential, and then folks maybe say "Hang the fuck on the duke, whats this nonsense you subjected me to?" This way, i make it clear that i think the film is amazing, but that i very rarely partake of its pleasures, on account of the unremmiting air of doom, the fact thats it's scary in an illogical and not-very-fun way, and it is utterly disgusting. But brilliant.
and then some folks will watch it and laugh through it. Whole world's upside down.
i don't know if that made any sense or confused matters further...
3 - Aaron, Duke De Mondo
and the "essential if you can stomach it" thing is pretty much a full-stop on it. If the extreme horror floats your depraved perverted boat, then this is manna from the gods or whatever. If you prefer sometihng a lot less puke-inducing, avoid.
4 - Eric Olsen
okay, that pretty well sums it up. In my pop culture laxity, I almost always avoid anything with "subject myself to" in the description
5 - Eric Berlin
Duke: excellent run-down as always.
How far back does Men Behaving Badly (UK) date? I seem to remember enjoying it when I lived over there around about '96 - '97.
And what's up with the Troma Bloodsport collection not including Blood Sucking Freaks? Now there's a "subject yourself to" one if there ever was one. I had a group of college friends back in the day that nearly deified that bit of bizarro/snuff, which is a story for another day and outside the public spotlight.
Eric Berlin
Dumpster Bust: Miracles from Mind Trash
6 - Bill Lamb
Great rundown Duke...but no special mention of "MacGyver"...the series that spawned an entire new term in the English language?
7 - Eric Berlin
Wow -- I totally missed the MacGyver listing, thanks Bill. I used to love that show.
8 - Aaron, Duke De Mondo
MacGuyver maybe means more to you US-based folks than it does to yours truly, ie, it means a joke in the simpsons. Forgive my cultural ignorance. I also glossed over Sky Captain...
Eric B, i think Men... dates back to around 92/93 or so. the first series, with harry enfield, was broadcast on ITV. it never really cuaght on till BBC bought it, and then improved it immeasurably.
9 - Jim Carruthers
I was going to mention you should really pay attention to the Lewis Black release, because he is the fella who is the closest to being something like Bill Hicks in the rage and funny and whatnot.
I've got this performance vid, and it is really funny, and like Hicks, raises righteous rage to an artform.
10 - Aaron, Duke De Mondo
ah, nice one Jim. Thanks. i hadn't heard of the fella, but i'll check him out.
11 - Jim Carruthers
Lewis Black does at weekly spot on "The Daily Show" called "Back in Black".
Check out the Comedy Central site for his spots of rage.
Or y'know, yeh just might check out torrentspy with tha dot com for some black humour.
12 - Eric Berlin
I agree that Black is one of the funniest substantive comedians working today. He's great on both The Daily Show and in regular stand-up.