A comic posing as a reporter and three crew members of new comedy show for British TV station Channel 4 were taken into custody Sunday after assaulting Tom Cruise with a squirt gun disguised as a microphone at the War of the Worlds premiere in London's Leicester Square.
Immediate fears that the star was made of brown sugar and would melt like the Wicked Witch of the West were allayed when he grew rigid rather than liquifying.
Watch the shocking incident here! Thank Theta it wasn't a Super Soaker!
After the attack, Cruise's assailant tried to escape, but the buff bantam locked his malefactor in a steely grip.
"Why would you do that?"
"What's so funny about that? It's ridiculous. Do you like making less of people?"
"Don't run away. That's incredibly rude.
"I'm here giving you an interview, answering your questions and you do something nasty. You're a jerk."
Cruise towelled himself off, smiled gamely at new fiance Katie Holmes, then resumed signing autographs.
A Channel 4 spokesman said later, "The incident was for a new Channel 4 entertainment show, part of which involves playing comedy pranks on celebrities and on members of the public. The water squirting was not intended to cause offence and was very much in a spirit of fun. We hope Tom Cruise will be able to see the joke in the spirit with which it was intended."
The Gang of Four will be questioned further by Scotland Yard today.
Article comments
— go to most recent comments1 - Mark
New comedy show.?? wasn't even funny imo.
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2 - Eric Olsen
it wasn't hilarious anyway
3 - Temple Stark
I'd react in pretty much the exact same way, with close to the exact same words.
The style of writing here makes it read as satire.
4 - bhw
What's kind of creepy is that the guy could have had anything in that squirty thing, like bleach.
5 - Prometheus
Don't squirt the squirt..he'll sue you...Mr No Sense of Humor strikes again...Lighten up Tom..you scientology midget!
6 - Eric Olsen
it was a squirt gun, it was water, it was for a British TV show - I will always feel free to mock overreaction
7 - bhw
But he could have easily have been a safety hazard. It's not like celebrities haven't had genuine problems with stalkers. I was just pointing out that they're vulnerable at events like that.
8 - RotaryPhone
Cruise handled it in stride. What would Russell Crowe have done?
9 - Condom_Sauce
My dad says that you shouldn't do it. Dad says that leave it alone
10 - Temple Stark
I think Eric was referring to my comment.
It's silly now - yes. In retrospect.
No one should have to have a sense of humor about being ridiculed in a public place (unless it's punk'd because that has context) - and as bhw mentions - real threats abound.
Nicole Kidman for one :-)
Should he have played with them, grabbed the gun and squirted back and palled around - all for the benefit of their rolling cameras?
I don't think so. Channel 4 used to better than to cater to tastes so low as to enjoy that type of thing, anyway.
11 - Natalie Davis
Punk'd may have context, but I say this is still a good warning to Ashton Kutcher.
12 - Eric Olsen
I agree the squirt was stupid and not particularly funny, but then Cruise somewhat overreacted, and then the cops way overreacted and the press equalled the cops. There is no way this dumb stunt can be called an assault, unless he was made of brown suger, that is.
13 - Temple Stark
How did Cruise overreact? He didn't hit anyone but asked questions about motivation.
14 - Temple Stark
And damnit, this is important ... :-)
15 - swingingpuss
I'd sue the reporter for 'mental trauma' ;)
16 - Silas Kain
A penis shaped squirt gun pumping whipping cream would have been much funnier and most appropriate.
17 - Brooke Lee
Bleach would have been funnier.
I do believe Tommy has a secret room full of his favorite S&M toys.
18 - Silas Kain
Sneakers & makeup?
19 - Natalie Davis
Bleach? Funny? Now, that's sick. In a world that gave us Mark David Chapman and the woman who allegedly bashed Leonardo DiCaprio in the noggin with a glass bottle and the paparazzi that reportedly smashed into Lindsay Lohan's auto and the person who planned to kidnap Harry Letterman, celebs can be in danger at times. Joking about having someone toss bleach at anyone just isn't funny or cool.
I agree that Cruise is probably overreacting (though I think the way in which he initially confronted the squirter was handled admirably), but what if a supposedly innocent camera crew turned out to be some violent wackjob?
20 - Tan The Man
The prank was dumb, but the premise of comedy show being devoted to pulling pranks on celebrities is even dumber. Have they not seen Punk'd recently? Man has that show gone down the dump since its first season. Who wants to see George Lopez get punk'd?
21 - Brooke Lee
That's right, by God celebrities are people too! They need round the clock security because clearly they are much more important than us peons.
*sigh* The world would not work without Tom Cruise. Or that gal who starred in Tank Girl. P. Diddy is one of this countries most valuable assets. Losing the entire cast of Friends would make 9/11 and the current genocide thriving in Sudan look like a mild misdemeanor.
22 - Tan The Man
Fun stuff.
23 - Rodney Welch
I LOVED seeing Tom Cruise get squirted. I thought it was hilarious, and the more they ran the tape, the funnier it got. Watching it over and over and over was like getting tickled, where you're just beside yourself with glee.
For the past two weeks, of course, it's been another tape we've seen over and over, ad nauseam: Tom jumping on the couch, whether Oprah or Dave's, and either Tom or Katie declaring their undying puppy love for each other. It's been a sickeningly cute public spectacle. To see him get squirted and then to just kind of implode was positively liberating.
You know, it has often been pointed out that one of the first scenes anyone ever filmed with a movie camera was a rich man in a top hat getting hit with a snowball. Audiences loved it; it's fun to see a pretentious fop fall on his face.
Funny what a squirt of water in the face will do. It's like acid, melting away layer upon layer of cheesy celebrity charm.
24 - dick cavasa
What is funny about this? Cruise overreacted? That is the funny part in this story when someone says he overreacted.
It is funny they got arrested. I wonder if Channel 4 will put cameras in the cell as they get punked in the arse.
25 - Eric Olsen
I don't think they spent any time in a cell, and I am certain charges will not be pressed if there is any sanity left in the world
I agree with those who mentioned the potential danger of a malicious assault, as opposed to this nonsense, but that is why overreacting -- especially the police as I have already said -- is so ill-advised.
And I don't think Cruise WAY overreacted, just continued on needlessly after he had made his point