Blu-ray Review: The Robe

Part of: Features From The Blu Lagoon

In an attempt to deal with the serious impact the medium of television was having on the film industry, studios began to seek new ways to impress and pull in audiences. One new strategy was Twentieth Century Fox’s widescreen format CinemaScope, based on the work of French professor Henri Chrétien. It almost doubled the aspect ratio and created a much larger image to engulf viewers “without glasses” as the posters pointed out in a dig at 3-D.

Although it was not the first Cinemascope film to be completed, a designation that belongs to How to Marry A Millionaire, the biblical epic The Robe was the first to be released because its grand scale was considered more likely to make a better debut. While it must have been impressive back in 1953, the film is a bloated melodrama with a terrible script. It’s easy to see why, if IMDb’s claim is accurate, that “Richard Burton once said this was the least favorite of all his films.”

The Robe tells the tale of Roman military tribune Marcellus Gallio’s (Richard Burton) conversion to Christianity, an interesting topic but it is handled so foolishly it’s difficult not to laugh at its feeble attempt. In a marketplace, Marcellus runs into a woman named Diana (Jean Simmons) who he used to be friends with as a child and hasn’t seen since. They discussed marriage as children, and she is still curious if he is going to keep his promise, which he surprisingly agrees to. The main stumbling block is Diana is already betrothed to Caligula (Jay Robinson), nephew of and heir to Emperor Tiberius. In a game of one-upmanship, Caligula buys a pair of twins ladies off the auction block Marcellus was trying to get and vice versa in regards to Greek slave Demetrius (Victor Mature in quite a stiff performance).

Angered by this public slight, Caligula has Marcellus sent to Jerusalem. On their way into town, Jesus Christ is seen riding on a donkey and Demetrius is somehow compelled to be a follower just from seeing him. Marcellus’ tour of duty is about up, but before his return he must oversee the crucifixion of Christ. Demetrius wanders Jerusalem to find anyone who can help him warn Christ. One man tells him it is too late because Christ was betrayed. As the man leaves, he identifies himself as Judas, which is immediately, and laughably, punctuated by a loud thunderclap.

At the crucifixion, Marcellus wins Christ’s robe shooting dice and gets Christ’s blood on him. When the weather turns foul, Marcellus orders Demetrius to cover him with the robe, which burns Marcellus with its touch. Demetrius takes back the robe and runs away.

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Article Author: El Bicho

This writer is a member of The Masked Movie Snobs, a collective that fights a never-ending battle against bad entertainment. Follow at twitter.com/ElBicho_MMS

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  • The Robe [Blu-ray] The Robe [Blu-ray]

    Studio: Tcfhe Release Date: 03/17/2009 Run time: 135 minutes Rating: Nr

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