Blu-ray Review: The Last House On The Left (2009)

There is little doubt in my mind that any sensible parent would want to seek revenge against those who have brutally attacked their offspring. I know I would. But, in our supposedly moralistic society that alleges to have a fair and balanced judicial system (which usually does more to benefit the guilty than the innocent), such an action would probably lead to much dire consequences. Thank goodness for that tireless “temporary insanity” plea — something the Collingwood family will surely use as their defense.


Despite having more money than God (how else can you explain a summer beach house that has its own summer guest beach house?) the Collingwood family have had their share of bad luck. Their teenage son died a year ago. The marriage between the doctorly patriarch John (Tony Goldwyn) and his attorney spouse Emma (ex-Boston Legal star Monica Potter) is strained. Worse, their 17-year-old daughter Mari (Sara Paxton) has aspirations of being an Olympic swimmer when she doesn’t even have the shoulders for it.

Things take yet another spiraling turn for Shitsville when Mari heads into town to team up with her dumber-than-dumb bimbo friend Paige (Martha MacIsaac) and they try to score some pot from a creepy kid named Justin (Spencer Treat Clark). Justin turns out to be the son of escaped killer Krug (Garret Dillahunt), who along with his gang of sociopathic murderers (Aaron Paul, Riki Lindhome), winds up kidnapping the girls. After a long drive into the woods, the fiends kill Paige. Mari is raped, subsequently shot while trying to escape, and left for dead. The bad guys make way to the nearest house for shelter from a storm, and are treated as welcomed guests by mom and dad Collingwood. Well, until a barely living Mari crawls onto the porch, that is — that’s when the parents reconsider their hospitality.

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Article Author: Luigi Bastardo

Luigi Bastardo is the disgruntled alter-ego of Adam Becvar, a thirtysomething lad from Northern California who has watched so many weird movies since the tender age of 3 that a conventional life is out of the question. …

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