Some of you may remember a particular action movie subgenre from the ‘80s: the ninja movie craze. The B-Movie producing team of Menahem Golan and Yoram Globus brought us many an unbelievably silly film, wherein the story’s protagonist (usually portrayed by a white guy so American audiences would watch it) would wind up going toe to toe with the deadly antagonist (usually Japanese) in the film’s finale. Sure, many people have tried since the ‘80s to forget having ever taken part in the craze, but none can ever forget the immortal words of actor Shô Kosugi in Revenge Of The Ninja: “Only a ninja can stop a ninja!”
Well, for those of you who once lovingly basked in the fermented-smelling glory of Golan-Globus’ martial arts epics, you’ll be pleased to know that the spirit of cheesy ninja flicks is alive and well in Ninja. The film, one of the seventy-kajillion low-budget pictures made in Bulgaria every year, stars British-born actor Scott Adkins (the new Michael Dudikoff) as Casey, the proverbial white guy raised in a dojo by his sensei (Togo Igawa) and his fetching daughter, Namiko (Mika Hijii). Casey’s archetypal rival throughout the movie is the fallen ninja trainee Masazuka (Tsuyoshi Ihara), who becomes an assassin-for-hire for an evil underground organization known as The Ring (led by a particularly hammy Miles Anderson).
The entire movie is cast with overactors and underachievers. Subplots are dropped at a moment’s notice. Copious amounts of CGI blood spray about and vanish without a trace. Our main heroes, despite having grown up with the day-in/day-out training and wisdom their sensei provided them, can’t seem to develop a little common sense when an army of Russian-looking thugs come-a-callin’ (e.g. our heroine, Hijii, who spends a small portion of the finale bound in rope — a little something for the bondage enthusiasts, perhaps?).
The list of flaws goes on and on, but one of my (subtler) favorites would have to be the obvious stock footage spliced in with the bits filmed on Bulgarian sets (which looks like it was used over and over but from different angles). All of these fine moments (and more) are meant to be taken seriously — instead, they all stand out like, well, a white guy in a ninja movie. However, these are the very reasons I enjoyed Ninja: it’s a swift-moving and thoroughly brain-dead flick that is an ideal candidate for a night in with your friends and a couple of stiff drinks.
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