Honestly, it’s as if Satan was trying to subconsciously convert all of humanity — and created Cats & Dogs as the perfect method of doing so. He even conned an assortment of Hollywood pros such as Jeff Goldblum, Elizabeth Perkins, Alec Baldwin, Susan Sarandon, and Charleton Heston (amongst others) to take part in his recruitment film from Hell. The latter actors got off easy by just providing their voices, while the former two stars had to endure a lot more embarrassment all around.
Of course, most of those actors really hadn’t done anything good (or at least interesting) in a few years anyway — so they had it coming, I guess.
As you might have already guessed, the story of Cats & Dogs involves talking, articulating CGI critters — an entire planetful, in fact. Turns out, all of the cats and dogs of Earth are able to speak. Plan. And plot. And there’s an entire war brewing between these species, with the cats attempting to cause all humans to become allergic to dogs, and the dogs attempting to save the world from the pussies.
Whoa, whoa, wait…are you seriously trying to tell me that a fucking dog can outwit a cat?! Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! The writers of Cats & Dogs (minions of Satan, as you may recall) obviously never owned a feline. Yes, I can completely fathom the concept of cats scheming to take over the whole world (they are cunning, you know), but I really can’t see a group of canines figuring out how to band together just to take turns pissing on the only fire hydrant in the neighborhood.
I also can’t see any reasonably sane person picking this one up on Blu-ray. Not just because it’s a bad film (whatever happened to critter-laden kiddie films like, say, The Secret Of Magic Island?), but because Warner Bros.’ A/V presentation for Cats & Dogs on Blu-ray is sub-par at best. The film is presented in a 1080p/VC-1 1.78:1 transfer, and boasts some relatively strong detail throughout — but the color scheme is even more cartoonish than the film deserves, with skintones leaning more towards the orange side, and an overly soft picture to boot.






Article comments