So, who wrote The Book Of Love? Well, according to the makers of American Pie Presents: The Book Of Love, the mighty tome was written by none other than Eugene Levy. And who could argue with that, really? After all, Eugene Levy is one of the most gorgeous and desirable men to ever walk in front of a camera — and if you’ve seen him as his famous SCTV character, Bobby Bittman, you no doubt know what I mean.
“How are ya!”
Sadly, though, Mr. Levy’s screen time in American Pie Presents: The Book Of Love — the latest chapter in the seemingly-endless flogging of a dead horse — is limited to somewhere in the neighborhood of ten minutes or so. The rest of the film is carried (in a rather mediocre manner) by the franchise’s new teen characters: Bug Hall, Kevin M. Horton, and Brandon Hardesty — all of whom are well-past their teenage years. The story (what there is of one, at least) has our three heroes all dealing with those complex hormone horrors we all experienced in high school (where applicable), and trying to lose their virginities. There’s really nothing new to be found here, with the exception of the film’s soundtrack, which contains at least fifty-gazillion new and modern hits (and a few old ones, too including “The Book Of Love”), and the film flaunts them mercilessly at us.
The only recognizable (or at least, enjoyable) plot point in the entire film centers on our main character, Rob (Bug Hall), who accidentally damages the infamous “book” from the original film (in which former students jotted down their sexual experiences in the hopes that future generations would learn how to please their ladies). He in turn discovers that the book was the brainchild of one Noah Levenstein (Levy), who now runs a carpet store. Rob and his pals meet up with the carpet salesman in an attempt to contact all of the other previous authors and recreate it, so as not to miss out on any further direct-to-video sequels. Again, this whole chapter lasts about ten minutes or so, and features a lot of familiar faces such as C. Thomas Howell, Christopher Knight, Tim Matheson, Steve Railsback, Robert Romanus, and Bret Michaels.