Before the Disco Ball Lowers and the Sequins Start Shimmying: A Preview of Dancing With the Stars Season 8 - Page 3

Gilles Marini and Cheryl Burke: Already suffering from an injury to his famous private parts (He was The Guy Who Showed His Thing on the Sex and The City movie), this least-known star is not starting off so well. But he is partnered with two-time winner Cheryl notorious for her get-tough tactics that propel her partners further than is really justified by technique (Sorry Maurice, it's true). 

Denise Richards and Maksim Chmerkovskiy: Another female model contestant, Richards could go the way of Stacy Keibler and Brooke Burke and show that her rockin' bod has some moves to go with it, or down the path of Shannon Elizabeth or Josie Maran, who show they're at their best in mannequin poses. The good news: I don't think Maks will put up with too many "It's complicated" excuses. 

Steve Wozniak and Karina Smirnoff: I'm betting Karina asked for a short-term partner so she has more time for wedding planning for her upcoming nuptials to fellow pro Maks. What else could explain her being paired with back-to-back "challenging" partners (Last season's was fourth-round ouster Rocco DiSpirito)? The Woz, one of Apple's founders, and thus a mega-millionaire, is one of the rare contestants who really doesn't need this competition for any discernible reason besides his own enjoyment. Who knows, perhaps his skills at Segway Polo will translate to a remarkably balanced dancer?

Belinda Carlisle and Jonathan Roberts: This year's nostalgia competitor, the one that draws in the baby boomers who remember singing along to "Heaven is a Place on Earth" in the 80s, is paired with the best middle-aged woman partner there is. He choreographed Marie Osmond's wild antics into a bizarre ventriloquist routine, and worked around Heather Mills' missing leg. If Carlisle's willing to pose nude at age 42 on the cover of Playboy for the Go-Gos' reunion tour, you can bet she won't balk at shimmying in her skivvys to boost her iTunes sales. 

David Alan Grier and Kym Johnson: I'll tell you a little secret: Most guys known for their sense of humor are not the best at physical pursuits. Name one comedian who has gotten past the third week. I don't think there's been one. These are people who, during their high school years, didn't have enough athletic ability and/or clear skin and/or muscle bulk to be popular, so they made fun of other people. Unless our sassy Aussie pro can boost him past the preceding comedians, or this funny man has some moves, I predict him to be one of the expendable contestants. 

Article Author: Kimberly Mauck

Kimberly Mauck writes travel and restaurant features for Oklahoma Today, teaches composition to college freshmen, blogs about her family, and often sheds blood, sweat, and tears working on her first novel, a young adult fantasy.

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