Don't you hate it when one of your odorous body parts detaches itself from your person, swells to 800 times its original size and completely destroys a major American city? I don't know about you, but I'm getting pretty sick and tired of this bi-weekly ritual. This scenario has happened to me at least sixty-two times in the last year or two, and the US government is starting to wonder if they should simply put yours truly out of his misery. After all, we can't have some guy's enlarged uvula crushing grandmothers into delightfully sugary wads, now can we? Of course not. Don't be so silly all the time.
Probably the best cinematic representation of those secretly living with this as yet untitled disease is cult director Mark Pirro's oddball 2004 comedy Rectuma. Granted, there aren't a lot of films that tackle this very sensitive subject, so there's really nothing else on the market to compare it to. A victory by default is still very much a victory, if you ask me. Besides, I doubt anyone other than the director of Curse of the Queerwolf could accurately depict the agony, the unbridled suffering of those cursed with this bizarre, socially-devastating affliction. Preach on, Brother Mark. You hold our eyes and ears in complete rapture.
After being anally raped by a demented frog on a sandy beach in Mexico, working class moron Waldo Williams — portrayed with loving grace by actor/comedian Bill Devlin — begins experiencing extremely sharp pains in the area of his body where the fudge is produced. According to our hero's finger-licking proctologist, Waldo's forceful amphibian lover deposited a very large blob of poison directly into the poor guy's prostate, causing it to swell to abnormal proportions. Unless he seeks the expertise of a kooky doctor named Wanasamsaki and his ass-obsessed assistant, Waldo should expect to drop dead in no less than three hours.
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Article comments
1 - Kaonashi
Jesus H. Christ. Where on earth DO you unearth these treasures?
Loved your review BTW!
2 - Chris Beaumont
I think I may have to see this, if only to believe it.
3 - T. Rigney
Kaonashi - Luck? Nah. Try lots of wasted hours reading message boards and fringe review sites.
Chris - It certainly needs to be seen by those who enjoy oddball cinema. Otherwise, you may hunt me down and jam your purchase where the sun doesn't shine. Much.
4 - Kaonashi
I couldn't help but think of Sir-Mix-A-Lot's "Baby Got Back" video when I read your review, especially the scenes when he's standing on a big, yellow ass.
5 - Dave
I hear that the filmmaker who made Rectuma is at it again, only this time he's parodying God. I went to his website www.pirromount.com and read about it. The movie is called The God Complex, and if he does to God what his last movie did for asses, someone's going to hell...or make a hell of a fun movie.
6 - DukeDeMondo
i SO need to see this... T - i very much hope your gettin government subsidy for unearthing these wonders. Might i suggest you head towards The Nostril Picker, which might be the very best film about a man is a schoolgirl all a sudden that has ever been made by anyone.
7 - Jordan Richardson
"After being anally raped by a demented frog on a sandy beach in Mexico..."
That part pretty much makes this flick a must-see.