Going to the movies can be a painful experience. As much as I hope that everything I go to will be entertaining, there are many, many films that do not have much to offer. 2006 had its share of bad movies. Fortunately, I do not regret seeing any of them. I can take a little pain in order to better serve my faithful readers. I try to remain positive. Every movie has its fans and every movie has something to offer, even if it only serves to show how not to make a movie.
What you are about to read is a list of the 10 films that landed unceremoniously at the bottom of my rankings for 2006. I have to say that it was not all that difficult to boil down my stew of films to the essence of bad. Well, the bad doesn't really need all that much introduction. Read on and see what films you can safely avoid, unless you like inflicting your eyes with the potentially pain inducing sights.
1. Basic Instinct 2. Simply the worst. Sharon Stone must be getting desperate for a paycheck to do this. There is nothing sexy about it, nothing thrilling, nothing intriguing. This is a sequel that no one needed and no one wanted. What can I say. This was just a dull movie. The story moved on a straight line to a conclusion that was not satisfying. The highly touted eroticism and Stone's full monty was nothing terribly exciting.
It was a film that did not get anything right. An obnoxious score, laughable dialogue and poor acting are the highlights. And to think, Sharon is considering directing a second sequel.
2. Date Movie. Terrible. There is only one reason to go near this, and that is the lovely Alyson Hannigan. This is just flat out not funny. All they do is mimic scenes from other films and never take them anywhere or connect them in any worthwhile fashion. It is becoming apparent that spoof comedy is losing the creativity and spunk that was exhibited back in the days of Airplane and Naked Gun.
Article comments
1 - Triniman
I've only seen Basic Instinct 2, on this list, but I certainly agree that it was a waste.
2 - Colin Boyd
I didn't see most of the horror movies on your list, because the studios won't screen them for press and if they don't want me to see it, I sure as hell won't pay to.
My Ten Worst:
1 - Van Wilder 2: The Rise of Taj
2 - Black Dahlia (how big a hack is Brian DePalma, anyway?)
3 - The Pink Panther
4 - The Wicker Man
5 - Basic Instinct 2
6 - Freedomland
7 - What the Bleep?! Down the Rabbit Hole
8 - Just My Luck
9 - The Shaggy Dog
10- Garfield: A Tail of Two Kitties
I didn't even have room for Eragon. What's that tell you?
3 - Stanley
"the studios won't screen them for press"
That's probably because you need more than a blog to be considered press.
4 - Chris Beaumont
Many films, horror in particular and films without studio faith in general, do not get screened for any critics of any type. They fear poor reviews will keep the paying public out of the theater.
5 - Iloz Zoc
Colin, cool site.
Chris is right about many horror films not available for pre-screening. But aside from the fear of critic-affected box-office, it's usually too expensive for a horror film budget to pre-screen in a theater. Shoe-strings can only stretch so far.
And screeners are sent out sparingly, mostly due to fear of copying, so that limits critic review even further to "safe" reviewers.
6 - handyguy
Chris, these films are probably very bad [I won't even bother to see most of 'em], but they're also easy targets. How about instead the Most Overrated movies of the year?
There are not as many as last year, when two of my 10 Worst made plenty of 10 Best lists [A History of Violence and Match Point].
This year, I would name Little Children most overrated among 'art films,' and X-Men: The Last Stand as the worst Big Hit. Plus Miami Vice and The Black Dahlia as the worst movies made by good directors.
7 - ProfEssays
There are plenty of bad movies nowadays. It is possible to call the article "My bottom fifty".