Today on Blogcritics
Home » Urgent news for the politically savvy blogger…

Urgent news for the politically savvy blogger…

“Ladies and gentlemen, can I please have your attention. I’ve just been handed an urgent and horrifying news story. I need all of you to stop what you’re doing and listen.”


I’m serious. There are things in this country and in this world that have nothing to do with George W. Bush. Or Iraq. Or religious zealots. Or gay marriage.


There are even some people in this world that don’t even care about partisan issues.

This morning while I was getting dressed for class, I decided to wear my light blue “holey” sweater. A rational person would say that this was the sweater I independently chose to wear today. But then you get partisans who will tell you, “Oh, she chose blue because she’s a Democrat and she hates America!” or “She’s wearing a holey sweater because Bush lied and stole her good sweater and he lied about Iraq!”

Most rational people are thinking there’s no way my clothing choice could be turned into a partisan issue. But it could. It probably will, too.

With Hurricane Katrina in the south, what most could see as a tragedy of nature has turned into, surprise surprise, another partisan attack on why George W. Bush is a bad president, or why we’re all sinners. It was a hurricane. I didn’t pay much attention in my natural science class, but I believe hurricanes are spurred by tiny gremlins living deep under the sea. And you know what? I don’t think those gremlins give two shits about who’s Republican or Democrat, sinner or saint.

Like it or not, we’re in Iraq. Like it or not, gas prices are obnoxious. Like it or not, my Spring Break 2006 destination is underwater. You have to deal with it, and we can either deal with it by fighting amongst ourselves, or we can suck it up and stand behind the leadership of our leaders, better or worse, for the next three years.

Like it or not.

Whether or not you actually pay attention to prophecy, or believe in karma, or believe in the tiny hurricane gremlins, the simple fact is that this country is not going to get better, things are not going to be resolved, until we can get past our partisan differences, depolarize ourselves, and come together.

Like it or not.

When it comes down to it, not everything is an opportunity to attack the other side. Sometimes we just have to get over our differences long enough to say “Fuck it,” and get along with those obnoxious, arrogant Republicans. Or those baby-eating Democrats.

We may intend to solve things with our particular partisan beliefs. We may intend to make things better. We may even intend to help people. But the fact of the matter is, this country doesn’t live with intentions, it lives with consequences. And the consequences of our partisan actions are much more negative than the intentions behind them.

And in case you were wondering, I did pick the blue sweater because I hate America.

About Chelsea Smith

  • ChelseaLou

    Silas, if you want Suss for a weekend, I’m not going to complain. If it gives me license to cash in on my flirtation with the hot guy who sits in front of me in class, have your way and have it merrily.

    Strange how this went from a political post to a thread where we all just make fun of ourselves. Dietdoc would be proud. :)

    Alka-Seltzior!!! :)

  • ChelseaLou

    Al, I forgot you were from Indiana. I’m currently a Boilermaker myself, born and raised near Ft. Wayne.

  • Bob A. Booey

    He’s busy getting the limestone and the shovel ready.

    Politics is boring.

    That is all.

  • Silas Kain

    Indeed, B.A.B. I think I’ll be a horticulturist in my next life.

  • Ronald Eakins

    Fortunately in this country we do not have to be stuck with inept criminals in public office till their term expires. They can be impeached tried and thrown out of office. Bush should be impeached today before he has a chance to kill anymore innocent people. How many more are you willing to have die so this idiot can ruin the country and world. Write your congressional representative demand they impeach Bush for crimes against humanity.

  • Al Barger

    Right Ronald. If memory serves, it seems like we had an ELECTION. Maybe like Al Gore you were drinking a lot of tea, and had slipped out to the bathroom and missed it.

    Sorry Charlie, ya pinkos lost. We’ve got congressional elections again next year though. If at first you don’t succeed… Well, actually, you might as well just give it up.

  • ChelseaLou

    Al, if you’re trying to vie for my hand in marriage, throwing out libertarian insults isn’t the way to get it. Tsk tsk…

  • ChelseaLou

    Ummmm … okay?

  • Eric Berlin

    Previous comment deleted by editorial staff, Chelsea.

  • ChelseaLou

    Exposer, you got me. Behind my white liberal facade, momma loves her some brown sugar… truth’s out.

  • Al Barger

    Miss Chelsea, sorry to be delayed in answering. I was in route driving to Olsen’s to meet up with you and Suss as you were putting up those responses, so I didn’t notice.

    Those weren’t particularly “libertarian” insults, just general disrespect for a schmuck who came in exactly contrary to the spirit of the post carrying on about impeaching Bush.

    As to vying for your hand, obviously any man would be all in favor of that. Now Suss seemed like a fine witty and amiable fellow, whom I would be pleased to know better. Still, I think I could take him if he were the only thing in my way. Least ways I could take him if I snuck up behind him with a 2×4.

    But then I’d have to deal with you. I doubt you’d be volunteering to leave a fine fellow like Sussman, so it would require carrying you off like the future Senator Blutarsky at the end of Animal House.

    About that point though, you’d probably take that 2×4 and break it off up in me. You have a fairly imposing physical presence. You could definitely stand up for yourself, and certainly have the force of will to do so. In short, unwanted advances would no doubt simply end up with you putting me in a world of hurt.

    Thus, I must concede that Sussman is indeed The Man.

    All hail Sussman!

  • ChelseaLou

    Oh come now, Al, just because I stand at a healthy 5’10 (6’1 in decent heels) and have been groomed my entire life as an athlete does not necessarily make an “imposing physical presence.” But I’ll just take the female route and assume you’re calling me fat and hate you for it.

    And ah, the Animal House reference. A necessity when dealing with us Greeks in order to make us understand ANYTHING…

    (And for the record, I can carry Sussman around. Seriously. There’s photographic evidence of it.)

  • steve

    life would be boring without the pinko commie feminists.

  • Al Barger

    It’s not that you’re so big, but that you’re so strong willed. [I note also that you have a tasty arm.] Your photo link doesn’t work, but I don’t need any convincing. I’d find it easy to believe that you’d just throw old boy over your shoulder and carry him off.

    By the way, if cheesing off Greeks is the way to your heart, I might could compete with Suss there. ONE FROM THE ARCHIVES

    Ah, “the female route…”

  • Dave Nalle

    Who the hell is Tucker Max? And did I see Babs up there exposing the possibility that he might be a Fratboy? How ironic, really.


  • Nick

    How alarming.. a spirit of amity prevails! Even Weird Al is only proposing to use a 2×4 as an opening love-gambit! Where is the unbalanced fanaticism? Where are the hounds of hate slavering at the door. (No, I will not specify whose door!) Anyway, I think we all agree that Suss is.. well, suss… Chel seems kinda chill too.. Enough bad wordplays.. may Happy Bunny Land long remain so!

  • Bob A. Booey

    What’s ironic? I quit the Greek life after a year, because I had enough friends and could get into all the parties (and thus all the girls) I wanted without having to pay dues and live in a packed house by paying to have friends. No offense, Madame President.

    That picture of Chelsea carrying Sussman is just hilarious. You bright young kids have such a modern, hip, gender role-reversed relationship.

    What sport did you play, Chelsea? You two should go out for one of those Strongman/woman competitions on ESPN2 late at night when they’re not showing chess or pool (which are NOT sports).

    And Senator, let’s be real here. Who are you really taking in a fight? I’d even pick Dave Nalle over you because while he’s no doubt much smaller, older and skinnier, he’s got the rage going.

    I think someone just heard “schmuck” for the first time today. But Yiddish is not for you because it’s not spoken in rural Indiana. Gai kakhen afen yam. I’m not even Jewish, but my Yiddish rules because I’m such a hip Gentile.

    Was there really an Blogcritics pow-wow with Olsen, Barger, and the Sussmans? That’s bizarre and unsettling.

    That is all.