“Trick or treat, smell my feet, give me something good to eat!” Most of us remember that nursery rhyme and from time to time we recite it to ourselves without even realizing it. The appeal of singing a song is just as intriguing as trick or treating itself. What with all the costumes and the pumpkins, even the artificial loud screechy noises, it is tough to avoid the appeal of trick or treating.
I have come to the realization that children do not even like trick or treating. Who really wants to dress up in a fad costume and prance around their neighborhood holding a bag and showing off their greedy side by asking for candy from a stranger? Does that sound like fun to you? I’m sure next you’re going to tell me how much fun it is getting presents from a stranger during Christmas too. Am I right? I mean it is pretty much a waste of time for the child because gone are the days of our parents and our parents’ parents being able to go around their neighborhood in whatever costume they want and accepting candy from a stranger without a care of it having been poisoned and your neighbor offering you homemade brownies or cookies.
What has happened to the world? Our children now have to wait to eat candy when they get home. Now the adults have to check it as if it is a terrorist walking through an airport. Well I can tell you that a mini-Butterfinger is not Al Qaeda, and if it is then the Tooth Fairy is my cousin twice removed on my mother’s side. Instead of candy, we should all go to the store and buy rice patties and offer them to children when they ring the doorbell. Nothing is wrong with a simple rice patty, it never did anything to anyone and on top of it, the rice patty does not cause you to have a sugar rush nor to gain weight.
Imagine Halloween with nothing but health food. I am going on record saying that all of us in America and even Britain should start a movement where candy is changed to nothing but healthy food like apples, oranges, pears, and even rice patties. The kids will love it, they will not be able to contain themselves. It will be a day to look forward to, much like it is now. Nothing wrong with a simple change, right? Halloween is for weak people, and it should be abolished. No one likes candy, no one likes costumes, and children are better off living boring lives where homework rules the land. Maybe after this movement becomes a reality, we can work on Christmas. How about it, who is with me? Let’s abolish every holiday known to mankind. It is not like people enjoy them. Happy Halloween everyone, may the candy stripers be with you.