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Top 5 On-Screen Beauties

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It is every man’s fantasy to be able to get with a female movie star (or a male movie star if that’s your preference). Here is my list of the top five (most beautiful) actresses that I would not hesitate to do anything if one of them came up to me and said I was cute. Heck, I’d even settle for a “Do you know where the restroom is?” And at that same moment, I would dump my girlfriend and move into her place.

1. Kate Beckinsale – There’s no one that comes close to her combination of beauty and sexiness. She’s currently filming Underworld 2. She has previously starred in Pearl Harbor and Serendipity. Not many people believe me when I tell them, but Kate did graduate from Oxford University.

2. Natalie Portman – She recently rose from the No. 3 spot on this list last year. It has a hard decision but the 1-2 punch of last year’s Garden State and Closer solidified her as one of the best actresses of her generation. She captured soul in Garden State and loneliness in Closer. No one doubts this woman’s talents.

3. Sandra Bullock – There are not many women who can look almost better at 40 than they were at 30, but Sandra tops that list. She recently stated that she would no longer make chick flicks anymore. I was heartbroken when I heard this because Miss Congeniality and Two Weeks Notice helped me fill many lonely hours. But with recent movie Crash, it’s safe to say that her film choices will better showcase her talents.

4. Julie Bowen – Not many people know this incredibly cute actress. She was the female lead in the NBC show, Ed, a few years ago. To Adam Sandler fans, she was the blonde chick in Happy Gilmore. I liked Ed a lot and was sad when it was cancelled.

5. Rachel Weisz – She is an underrated actress made popular from the Mummy franchise. She doesn’t hesitate to do smaller films like Sunshine or The Shape Of Things. She is a very versatile actress and can next be seen in Darren Aronofsky’s The Fountain.

There’s my list. Most people can’t believe or agree with my list because there aren’t any “hot” actresses like Jessica Alba or Rebecca Romijn-Stamos. I sometimes surprise myself that the list isn’t filled with blonde women. The only blonde on the list is Julie Bowen, and only 5 people I’ve even known know who she is. I don’t find “hot chicks” nearly as attractive as I do beautiful chicks.

Enough of my drooling and lusting… who’s on your list? I don’t discriminate between sexes. My next list would be, if I was gay, my Top 5 On-Screen Hunks.

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About Tan The Man

I am a proud dork and loser.
  • http://www.temptationwaits.com visualsimplicity

    Wow, 3 of your 5 would make my list. Kate Beckinsale, Natalie Portman, and Rachel Weisz. I would say you have great choices in women, but that Sandra Bullock one totally throws me off. My other 2? Charlize Theron and Kiera Knightley (mostly because she resembles Natalie Portman).

  • http://www.temptationwaits.com visualsimplicity

    Oh wait, only 5? I just remembered another one. She’s a little less known though, Alicia Witt.

  • http://spaces.msn.com/members/dorksandlosers Tan Hoang

    How does Sandra Bullock throw you off? OMG, have you seen Miss Congeniality? She was so hot in it. I take it, you don’t know who Julie Bowen is? GRRR… No one does.

  • http://spaces.msn.com/members/dorksandlosers Tan Hoang

    Alicia Witt, to me, is more cute than beautiful. She can’t be categorized in the same with Kate or Natalie. But cute nonetheless.

  • http://www.temptationwaits.com visualsimplicity

    I don’t know man, Sandra Bullock just seems to have a manly face to me. Oh and I know who Julie Bowen is now, but didn’t know her name until after your post. Sorry.

    Oh yeah, and another one to add to the list (there’s just so many!). Thandie Newton!

  • http://spaces.msn.com/members/dorksandlosers Tan Hoang

    There are many. That’s why I had to limit it to 5.

  • http://www.temptationwaits.com visualsimplicity

    Have you seen Alicia Witt in Cecil B. Demented? She was “hot” in that one. Gorgeous any other time. Something about redheads.

  • http://gonzo-marx.blogspot.com gonzo marx

    Milla Jovovich

    Angelina Jolie

    Brigitte Fonda

    and many others…even more if you count “classic” types in their day…Audrey Hepburn comes to mind first (wonder why?)

    just a bit of sharing for ya…

    well, you asked!!!

    {8^P~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Excelsior!

  • http://spaces.msn.com/members/dorksandlosers Tan Hoang

    I didn’t include the classic beauties because I don’t think many people nowadays can really associate themselves that image of beauty. But if I did, Ingrid Bergman would have been No. 1 times infinity. Audrey Hepburn is beautiful. Funny, my friend thinks Bridgette Fonda too, but I can’t see why? Help.

  • Nick Jones

    My Five, in no particular order:

    Keira Knightley
    Charlize Theron
    Natalie Portman
    Rebecca Miller (Regarding Henry, and late playwright Arthur Miller’s daughter), who resembles the young

    (ALWAYS #1) Jacqueline Bisset. Alas, most of her films have been unmemorable, but from her early days (Casino Royale) to her middle period (The Deep) to the few latter day roles she’s taken (Dangerous Beauty), she’s always, for me, exuded a sensuality that not only smouldered, but was intelligent and witty as well, an irresistable combination for me. She’s sixty now, but I’d still like to make her breakfast the next morning, knowwhatImean, nudge-nudge, wink-wink.

  • http://www.mondoirlando.com Aaron, Duke De Mondo

    i can scarsely fathom how Kirsten isn’t on this list. i can only assume it’s becuase She’s above such malarkey, and leaves list-hogging to the likes of Knightley and co.

  • Duane

    Five is way too restricting. So, I’m going to cheat and give you five names in three categories, but in no particular order.

    1) Conventionally Beautiful

    Catherine Zeta-Jones
    Ashley Judd
    Charlize Theron
    Madeleine Stowe
    Monica Bellucci

    2) Indefinably Sexy

    Salma Hayek
    Ellen Barkin
    Bernadette Peters
    Jennifer Jason Leigh
    Kate Winslet

    3) Cute

    Phoebe Cates
    Marisa Tomei
    Renee Zellwegger
    Jenna Elfman
    Joey Lauren Adams

    I’m reminded of the movie Throw Momma from the Train. Billy Crystal is teaching a creative writing course for adults, and one of the students, an elderly fellow, submits his paper, entitled something like “100 Women I’d Like to Boink.” One of them was “the girl in the taco commercial.”

  • http://draven99.blogspot.com Chris Beaumont

    Hmmm, my quick list:
    Jessica Alba: she’s been my girl since the Dark Angel days.
    Jennifer Garner: She has that athletic hot thing going on.
    Nicole Kidman: Ever since she graced the screen in Days of Thunder
    Eliza Dushku: mmmmmmm Dushku
    ELisha Cuthbert: mmmmm Cuthbert

    Honorable mentions: Heather Locklear, Kirsten Dunst, Kristen Bell

  • Nick Jones

    Jennifer Garner’s a bit thin on the top, isn’t she? Never mind; to each their own.

  • http://spaces.msn.com/members/dorksandlosers Tan Hoang

    Duane – Good call on Monica Belluci – she is incredibly beautiful, too bad not many people know who she is. If I made an Honorable Mention sidenote, she definitely would have made it.

  • Eric Olsen

    very nice Tan, but how could you leave off “Van Helsing” for Kate? Love that accent, the boots and push-up bodice

  • Bennett

    Helena Bonham Carter (Fight Club)
    Kirstin Dunst
    Katherine Hepburn (at 30)
    Elizabeth Taylor (at 25)
    Debra Winger (any age)

  • http://spaces.msn.com/members/dorksandlosers Tan Hoang

    True, Eric… but I think most people when they thing of Van Helsing they associate it with Hugh Jackman (can’t complain) so I wanted to mention movies that people really associate her with.

  • http://spaces.msn.com/members/dorksandlosers Tan Hoang

    I have to point out Jennifer Connelly. Enough said. And I have to apologize for not including her, she would have been on an honorable mention list.

  • http://duckmafia.blogspot.com Quack Corleone

    Unmentioned as of yet:

    Paz Vega (‘Spanglish’)
    Kristanna Loken (‘Treminator 3′)
    Eva Mendes {‘Out of Time’)
    Famke Janssen (‘X-Men’)

    and

    Grace Kelly!

  • http://www.roblogpolitics.blogspot.com RJ

    “I would dump my girlfriend and move into her place.”

    I hope she isn’t reading this! :)

  • http://spaces.msn.com/members/dorksandlosers Tan Hoang

    How could I forget Grace Kelly? Nice One. As for my girlfriend, she knows my list and I’m slowly convincing her on the possibility of 3-some with these beautiful ladies.

  • http://www.roblogpolitics.blogspot.com RJ

    Here’s mine, in not real order:

    Charlize Theron

    Angelina Jolie

    The chick from The Simple Life who wasn’t Paris Hilton

    Jenna Jameson

    Janeane Garofalo

    (Yes, I know, Janeane Garofalo isn’t on too many people’s top 5 lists. Or even top 100 lists. But, man, I would do terrible things with that chick…might even do enough damage to make her a conservative!) ;-P

  • http://www.roblogpolitics.blogspot.com RJ

    Oh, I forgot Ashley Judd!

    Make it a top 6 list! :)

  • http://www.roblogpolitics.blogspot.com RJ

    No one is putting Eva Longoria on a list? I’m shocked…

  • http://www.temptationwaits.com visualsimplicity

    Ouch. Chris, good call on Elisha Cuthbert. I can’t believe I forgot about her. I’m going to have to bump Kiera Knightley off my list for her. 3 brunettes and 2 blondes. I’m surprised at myself, I thought it’d all be brunettes.

    Here’s a few more as yet unmentioned beauties (I’m thinking all modern day here though) that didn’t make my list:

    Denise Richards
    Kylie Minogue (she used to be on screen)
    Kate Hudson
    Kelly Hu
    and
    Aishwarya Rai

    Boy has this list been diluted or what?

  • Larry P

    You guys are so shallow. Admit it-no movie star is ever going to even talk to you. A little reality, please.

    On the other hand, the possibility for some out of work tv celeb latching on is not unfathomable:
    a) any ex Charley’s Angel
    b) Donna Mills
    c) the original Daisy Duke

  • Bradley

    I have but one thing to say. I’m glad someone else recognizes the beauty of Julie Bowen. She’s my all-time favorite and so very, very underrated.

  • The Theory

    Kate Hudson of the Almost Famous era is amazing.

    I think I tend to lean toward the “cute” category than the hot or drop-dead or whatever.

  • Cyrano de Bergerac

    So sorry Tan Hoang but Kate Beckinsale did not graduate from Oxford!

  • http://spaces.msn.com/members/dorksandlosers Tan Hoang

    Okay, upon looking at her bio more carefully, it looks like she attended Oxford but did not graduate. My mistake. But that doesn’t diminish her intelligence.

    Kate Hudson is VERY cute.

    Julie Bowen is beautiful.

  • http://www.immafooker.com Brooke Lee

    Since someone complained about not enough gals sharing their opinion:

    I agree with Natalie Portman; she’s flawless and reminds me of Audrey Hepburn.

    Speaking of Audrey Hepburn, she is next on the list.

    Sarah Michelle Gellar: there is no other itty bitty petite blonde gal that can kick better ass; which is why I was so disappointed with The Grudge.

    Rebecca Budig from All my Children: I would kill to be that tiny and gorgeous.

    Zhang Ziyi because clearly I have a soft spot for petite gals who kick ass, and also I don’t believe there’s such a concept as an ugly Asian woman.

    Charlize Theron: I thought she was still beautiful in Monster.

    Ingrid Bergman: Sure they had perfect lighting and ways to make the black and white movie actress shine, but Ingrid Bergman never needed it — she was a true classic beauty.

    Nicole Kidman can wear a burlap sack and still look a vision.

  • jut

    Julie Bowen
    Kiera Knightley
    Natalie Portman
    Carly Pope(from ‘Popular’, really sexy eyes)
    Milla Jovovich