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Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes: Is They Is Or Is They Ain’t?

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In an attempt to cut off the already swirling rumors at the Paparazzi Pass, Tom Cruise and his lovely Katie Holmes call an upcoming Life & Style report called “Split!” “100 percent false,” according to As though they felt the need to go further, the curious couple of note go further in issuing a statement through their publicist that all reports of breakupsville are riddled with “malicious fallacies.”

It would seem that these rumors come at a particularly delicate time in the lifecycle of the celebrity romance as it was only last October that the happy couple announced that they are expecting their first child.

And to think: it was only last spring that a hyperkinetic Tom jumped up-and-down and up again on Oprah’s (pre-Frey) couch. Perhaps the celebrity lifecycle has shrunk in much the same way technology has crushed the timeline on things like the lag between movies hitting the big screen and release to DVD.

According to ABC News online:

Citing unnamed sources described only as “multiple insiders,” Life & Style reported that Cruise and Holmes had agreed to call off their engagement but maintain the “charade” of a romance until after the birth of their baby.

Now, normal humans would but ask: why the hell would they maintain a charade until after the birth of the baby? Maintaining a charade until the kids go to (bizarro-celeb) college doesn’t really make sense to me, though I can buy some of its merits.

This is all prelude to the real question we need to ask ourselves: will off-screen turmoil and/or charades and/or hyperkinetic Scientology non-medicinally induced craze-bliss ever affect Cruise’s on-screen work?

The crazy thing, maybe, is that the guy is a damned good actor who usually doesn’t get the credit he deserves.

Maybe he and his Katie are busy spending it to quell the latest rumors.

Update: Meanwhile, Mr. Cruise is suing over alleged “gay investigations.”
Edited: [GH]

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  • Victor Lana

    Interesting post, Eric. My feelings on this are based on my annoyance with Mr. Cruise’s whole career (I’ve always argued he basically plays himself). Perhaps now he is forced into an unforeseen dilemma: the “himself” part is no longer the part he can play without difficulty.

    There is just an aura of weird that pervades this Tom-Katie thing. It has been strange since the start and no doubt will get stranger as the days move toward the birth of this poor kid.

    Oddly enough, for some reason I do hope all goes well for them, the rumors are wrong, and there is happiness in Tomkatville.

  • Nancy

    Hopefully they will soon be consigned to the oblivion they both so richly deserve.

  • Elvira Black

    The rumors of Tom’s gayness have of course been circulating since forever. I’d heard at some point that the Cruise-machine had such a stranglehold on the media that if anyone ever breathed a word or asked about the gay thing they would be denied all media access to Tom forevermore–though again I couldn’t swear to it.

    As for his acting ability, I think he was superb in Born on the Fourth of July. Too bad he didn’t nab more roles like that one, that took him out of his ubiquitous pretty-boy facade.

    “Not that there’s anything wrong with it,” as Seinfeld would say, but I suspect that for many, knowing that an actor playing a romantic leading man was gay might make it harder to suspend one’s disbelief, so I can’t really blame the boy for wanting to keep it hush hush if possible–if he is gay, that is.

    But the whole anti-psych med thing and the Katie mania are really beyond the pale.

  • chantal stone

    i’m not a big Tom Cruise fan, but he was awesome in THE LAST SAMURAI. it seems that his personality is perfectly suited for roles which require such a high level of intensity.

    but really, someone needs to slip some meds into his kool-aid.

  • Eric Berlin

    I’m not swayed by the “gay rumors” as they seem to swirl around many Hollywood leading men, don’t they?

    I’ve actually tried to not like Cruise the Actor but I’m forced to realize that he’s been in too many outstanding movies — Top Gun (for sheer popcorn fun and perhaps the iconic ’80s film), Vanilla Sky (one of the most underrated films of ever), Last Samurai, Jerry Maguire, A Few Good Men, Born on the 4th of July, etc. — to not be at least very very good nearly every time out.

    As for personally and with Katie and the religious stuff: yep, he batty.

  • sal m

    maybe the huge, glowing orb that resides at the scientology headquarters and channels l. ron hubbard’s sprit spoke to tom and told him that katie was no good.

    and there are rumor’s that tom cruise is gay? what’s next you’re going to tell me that milli vanilli didn’t sing on their records?

  • Eric Berlin

    Funny, Sal !