A partial transcript of this week’s special Monday edition of Treehouse Fort:
The Indianapolis Colts will return to the Super Bowl after a 30-17 win over the Jets. This will be their second Super Bowl trip in four years, the latter of which will also be played in Miami, Florida. For those who don’t speak Spanish, Mark Sanchez literally translates to “Rex Grossman.”
The Colts will play the New Orleans Saints, who beat the Minnesota Vikings 31-28 in overtime. This will be the first trip to the Super Bowl that New Orleans has ever made, or at least that they can remember, given the splitting headache they endured Monday morning.
In a surprise acquisition, the New York Mets traded for Angels outfielder Gary Matthews, Jr. Mets manager Jerry Manuel says he plans to platoon Matthews, Carlos Beltran, and Angel Pagan on the 15-day disabled list.
A winter storm warning has been issued for Cuyahoga County and the greater Cleveland area. Meteorologists predict 6-to-12 feet of trade rumors involving the Cleveland Cavaliers. As a safety precaution, if you are driving and you hear about an Amar’e Stoudemire trade rumor, remember to steer into the skid.
Charlie Doherty’s “What Were They Thinking?”
Don “Moose” Lewis, for starting an all-white basketball league
Jose Offerman, for punching an umpire in the Dominican league; now banned for life
Detroit Red Wings fans, for climbing a Joe Louis Arena catwalk during Wings-Kings game
PGA golfer Jim Thorpe, for failing to pay $2M in income taxes and getting one year in jail
USC women’s coach Michael Cooper, for saying “[f-bomb] UCLA” during the USC-UCLA postgame conference
Bob Knight, for saying Gatorade is a PED like steroids