This week on the Treehouse Fort, we discuss Armando Galarraga, NBA vs. NHL, World Cup paranoia myths, and how to organize a sports bar lock-in.
Tuffy: Stanley Cup Finals, now tied 2-2, were marked by the appearance of a Flyers fan in Game 4 carrying an effigy of a beheaded Native American. A Blackhawks fan noted the favor would not be reciprocated during Sunday’s Game 5 in Chicago. Quote: “Flyers fans don’t act any differently without their heads attached.”
Suss: Tigers pitcher Armando Galarraga came within one out of pitching a perfect game before first base umpire Jim Joyce called Cleveland’s Jason Donald safe at first, when replays conclusively showed he was out. Indians GM Mark Shapiro then hired Joyce as their hitting coach, since he seems to be the only guy who knows how to get Indians on base.
Tuffy: Game 2 of the NBA Finals will take place Sunday night. As usual, it will begin with the National Anthem and an apology from both teams for distracting from LeBron James’ free agency tour.
Suss: In an interview with Larry King, LeBron James said that Cleveland has an “edge” in the LeBron James free agency sweepstakes. Should James sign elsewhere, Cavaliers fans will use that “edge” to cut themselves out of misery.
Tuffy: Soccer’s World Cup begins next weekend in South Africa with a match between England and the United States. A loss for the United States would be doubly damaging as, unlike the NHS, US Soccer’s insurance plan doesn’t cover ass-whoopins.
Suss: And finally, legendary UCLA basketball coach John Wooden passed away at the age of 99. The Treehouse Fort sends its thoughts to Wooden’s friends and family, and wishes him well in the afterlife, entombed in the secret sarcophagus of the Pyramid of Success.
Charlie Doherty’s “What Were They Thinking?”
Minor leaguer Engel Beltre, for starting a brawl during his walkoff homer trot
Yankees minor league coach Patrick Daneker, having his Yankees WS ring stolen by hookers
Umpire Jim Joyce, blowing the call on Galarraga’s near-perfect game.
L.A. Times writer Ted Green, writing: “[Paul] Pierce’s idea of a fun night is going clubbing and getting stabbed. Good times!”
Flyers left wing Daniel Carcillo, for knocking down teammate Jeff Carter on an attempt to hit Tomas Kopecky