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The Simpsons Get Lost In Translation and Arabs Eat Kahk

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The first sure sign that we’re winning the war on terrorism is that TV’s “The Simpsons”, my favorite television show of all time next to “Mr. Belvedere“, is finally being brought to Arab TV.

However, it’s not quite the same show you’ll find syndicated 2-6 times a night on Fox. In order to fit the show with the values of Middle-Eastern culture and Islam, “The Simpsons” is now called “Al Shamshoons”. It roles right off the tongue if you ask me. All characters voices will be dubbed by one serious but respectful Arab man. Furthermore, Homer will now be known as Omar and Bart will be known as Bahr. As reported from ABC News, Duff beer will be changed to an Arab soft drink, hot dogs will become Egyptian beef sausages, and donuts will become popular Arab cookies called “kahk” – And I’m not making that up.

Not only that but Moe’s Tavern and “Kid Gruesome” himself, Moe Syzlack, have been written out altogether as well as 85% of the characters and situations in the episodes.
Due to the fact that they are female characters, Marge and especially young feminist Lisa Shamshoon are written out almost entirely, and when they do show up are not permitted to speak.
As a result of the cultural modifying, there are only 7 episodes that are acceptable to be aired and all 7 of them have been cut down to 4 1/2 minutes each. Those 4 1/2 minutes will be a mixture of poorly dubbed political propaganda and scripture lessons from the Koran.

While he may not be a donut-worshiping, bacon-eating offensive but lovable boozehound Christian, ” “Omar Shamshoon still says “D’oh!” ”

Next on the Arab TV block is their version of the American hit Friends about a group of hip 20-somethings who are just trying to make it in America’s unholy capitalist society with a little help from their friends (aww).
The Arab version will be called “Infidels” and by airing fully unchanged episodes it will fuel the hatred of American culture, just as it has in America.

My only question is whether the Arab version of The Simpsons will be available in America. It might not be the same show we are all used to, but lets not dismiss the possibility that an edited Islam-friendly cut might be far better than the original. Face it, the last 5 seasons of the show haven’t been quite up to their normal standard of excellence, perhaps a Middle Eastern makeover is just what this long-lasting series needs! And do we really need such gratuituous use of the word “butt” on TV?
It might not be funny anymore, but the limited gratification of comedy is nothing compared to eternal salvation, a principle that only “The War At Home” seems to follow.

*Disclaimer: This article is half fabricated satire. It is in the “satire” section because its goal is to magnify the absurdity of an Islamic version of “The Simpsons” by exageration. It should not be taken as “news” because, while there are many facts in it (which are attributed to a real news article at ABC News), many false points are integrated to make it unbelievable. This was for comic effect, I hope it worked.

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About Jordan Clifford

  • Hani Z

    I am an “original” “The Simpsons” fan from the middle east. I agree with Mr. Clifford; the Arabic version of “The Simpsons” simply sux!! Homer sounds like a smart guy, and there is nothing funny about the show anymore. I couldn’t stand watching a full episode.

    However, on the contrary to what Mr. Clifford has mentioned, Lisa and Marge show up alot in the episodes (just like the original Simpsons). And their character voices are played by very famous, highly paid female actors. The episodes are still as long as the original.

    All of this doesn’t rule out the fact that MBC has ruined “The Simpsons”. And by hiring few of the most famous and highly paid actors to play the voices, MBC has done a very bad investment.

  • http://www.mediawave.blogspot.com Jordan

    Response to comment: Thanks for your comment. I just want to make clear that this was in Satire for a reason. I just added a Disclaimer to make certain, at the risk of whatever humor there was, that this was understood.

    I read the news story on ABC news, thought it was funny and make up ludacris but believable effects of an American TV on Arab TV and integrated made up mockery with real news fact.
    Not only are Lisa and Marge still in the show but Mr. Belvedere is not, in fact, my other favorite show. And to my knowledge, Friends isn’t being syndicated on Arab TV under the title “Infidels” either.

    Hopefully if anyone actually read this post they got some of the Simpsons-esque humor I was going for.

  • Hani Z

    I have been reading alot of comments regarding this translated Simpsons issue, and I reached this page through a search engine. I read the article quickly, and it didn’t occur to me that it might be a satirical one.

    Of the many articles written on that subject, I think this is the first satirical article(an excellent one I guess). So thumbs up!!!

  • http://www.theraphi.com The Raphi

    Great article. Just shows you how retarded these people are.

    I wouldnt be surprised if they did air “friends” as “infidels”…

  • Simpsons Fan

    Is Homer really the same person without drinking Duff and being the dumbass that we have all grown to love throughout the years?